a good day for elitism, is it not?
Via Atomic Nerds, we learn of the scientifically illiterate crowd concerned citizens filing suit against CERN because they’re afraid the impending test of the Large Hadron Collider will create a Black Hole that will destroy the planet, or cause some other similarly unpleasant event.
I love the snark in the CERN spokesman’s comment on the lawsuit, where he points out that the nature of quantum physics means there’s some probability of almost anything happening, including the chance that the LHC “might make dragons that will eat us up.”
Personally, I think the chance of creating dragons is a compelling argument for the activation of the LHC, because that would be totally awesome.
In related news, I am striving to replace certain expletives in my vocabulary with new, less blasphemous variants. I’ve grown particularly fond of “Reason H. Science!”, and “Oh, for Sagan’s sake!”, but I’m always shopping for new ideas, so if you have any scientifically-themed alternate expletives, feel free to submit them.
May 7, 2008 at 10:52 am
well, on-topic, some might be described as not knowing their asshole from a blackhole…jtc
May 7, 2008 at 11:19 am
Some of the Manhattan Project scientists also wondered about the remote possibility of triggering a planet wide fission chain reaction. Didn’t happen.
Fire up the LHC. It likely won’t destroy the universe. We will very likely find out some cool things. If it DOES destroy the universe, we aren’t likely to notice, and with the way humanity has been going with a slow descent into chaos, we might as well rip the band aid off all at once.
As for science related expletives, try “mother-fusing subatomic piece of blue shift.”
May 7, 2008 at 12:11 pm
Sometimes for my own amusement I make up bizzare curses based on obscure mythological figures, like “great gorgon’s teat” or “well I’ll be a haemunculi”. “Hecate’s six nipples!” was fun for a bit.
They never seem to catch on though.
May 7, 2008 at 12:46 pm
Innofensive expletives. Hmm.
When I got out of the Army i knew my language needed some alteration, so I started by substituting “bloody” and variants: OK in the US, but be careful in some other parts of the Anglosphere.
Or, watch a few movies with W. C. [no, not "water closet": William Claude] Fields. I am particularly fond of his frequent “GODfrey DANiel!” explosions.
May 7, 2008 at 1:47 pm
I’m fond of “Mother-HEISENBERG”, myself. “Muller’s ratchet!” makes an excellent muttered curse at the genetically disadvantaged, also.
May 7, 2008 at 2:56 pm
What the frelk? You have to look far and wide for substitutes?
May 7, 2008 at 2:58 pm
I was heard to roar “Heinlein’s Haemhorroids!” at a peice of relacitrant equipment recently, in addition to the “Great Scott!”s which are becoming more common. I find the casual use of anglo-saxon monosyllables increasingly dull these days, particularly given the Englandian penchant for using them as every other word. Finding decent things to bellow is an ongoing trial.
May 7, 2008 at 3:55 pm
I suppose there are worse ways to go. Test away! And heck, maybe we’d actually end up in some other dimension!
May 7, 2008 at 7:16 pm
I suppose that lately I have opted for using foreign words, like “scheiss.” (Did I spell it right? Damfino.) Scheisskopf. (Sh*thead.) Or I remember the Blackhawk comics from the 50s: Verdamnt, as I recall. I see names on vehicles that lend themselves to being alternate swearwords (Asplundt? I think that’s one. I haven’t seen one of their trucks lately — they trim trees, as I recall.)
Science fiction is a good source for new words. The only one I can think of now is TANJ, which obviously is an acronym. Niven/Pournelle, I believe. “There Ain’t No Justice.” Best swearword evar!
May 7, 2008 at 7:37 pm
So, Barrett .50 or Lahti 20mm for those dragons?
May 7, 2008 at 7:58 pm
I’d go for .408 CheyTac for the dragons, cause I wanna be really far away when I shoot at them. Tomahawk missiles would be better.
Lawdog uses a bunch of great curses, like judas priest on a flaming pogo stick, or sweet shivering shiva.
May 7, 2008 at 8:01 pm
There may be some misunderstanding.
The concern is not dragons, but drag ‘uns. And the protection against same is not a big-bore (that would only excite them) but rather a simple rubber device (or poor taste in clothing).. And black holes? let’s not even go there.
May 7, 2008 at 8:22 pm
S’true, the LawDog curses properly. Then again, I was yelling “Hell’s Panty Pads!” into the mic when I was getting blowed up in an online game earlier, so I may actually not be qualified to add to this.
And everyone knows the M230 30mm chaingun is the best thing to use on dragons, with the GAU8/A running a very close second.
May 8, 2008 at 12:04 am
Cheezus Pizza and Pizza’s Crust are two of my favorite expletives :p
May 8, 2008 at 12:19 am
You mean it’ll give us dragons? Fire up that Collider!
May 8, 2008 at 6:16 am
I like to use imaginary cursewords that sound like russian …
May 8, 2008 at 11:15 pm
That reminds me of this great cartoon I saw recently– What Atheists Cry Out During Sex
May 9, 2008 at 6:33 am
I read that as “Large Hardon Collider.”
Shows which gutter my brain is in.