Day Three of remodeling. The plastic now covers most of downstairs. Am holed up with the kids in the upstairs bedroom loft. Can’t access the kitchen. Running short on supplies—natives getting stir-crazy. Send licorice, bourbon, Thomas the Tank Engine DVDs, and flexible restraints in preschooler size.
Captain Oats had a super suggestion for such extreme and isolated conditions.
Go out. Be some time.
Of course, it all depends on whether you can find the door.
Introduce the children to the game of tie up. You tie them to a chair, and when they get free its their turn.
Just dont forget the gags as well
Who are you giving the Bourbon too??
That depends on whether he can find the sippy cups.
Sippy cups! My kids are old enough to drink out of proper lowball glasses now.
Not enough bed linens to make an escape rope?
You forgot benadryl and duct tape…
Hold out a few more weeks! Relief is coming! A joint Hessian/Sichuan force is preparing to land south of your position. From there we’ll decollate and kung fu our way through Connection Cut and Assachusetts to New Ham’s Here.
Hole in and hold out!
Coming Stateside with the Beloved? Send me an email with the details. We’d be glad to have you.
Yep, flights are booked, details to follow via email.
If they are already in the room with you, it’s too late; you are DOOMED to a slow lingering death by Thomas the Tank Engine overload…
They say it’s the thought that counts, so I drank some bourbon, went down to the local playground, tied up a few toddlers, burned a couple “Thomas” DVDs, and threw licorice at the seagulls … all while shouting, “It’s for Marko! It’s all for Marko!”
I should be released in 7 years if I behave myself.