clutter is a sign of genius
If that’s true, then I have an IQ of 24,000. I’m trying to dumb it down, though, I swear.
the good ol’ boy system
It’s the kind of social network where the male WASPs essentially run a city or organization, and you have to “do a good ol’ boy a favor” if you want to worm your way in. (Catholics, Jews, and blacks generally need not apply.)
I don’t know about the rest of their menu, but Schlotzky’s Reuben is made with Swiss cheese, rye bread, sauerkraut, and liberal amounts of highly addictive drugs.
what wine do you serve with kittens
That depends on your method of preparation. Are we talking deep-fried, sautéed, baked, or just quickly microwaved? Only an uncultured lout would make a recommendation without knowing how exactly that kitten meal will be prepared.
no social life 19
Wipe off that mascara, and get out of the house once in a while. (Wiping that scowl off your face might also help…very few girls want to date or hang out with a gloomy dude who thinks that growing up in suburban America is the epitome of existential suffering. Dude, your PlayStation alone costs more than the average African earns in a year, so cheer the fuck up.)
You know the kind: the young “martial artist” who thinks that Japanese swords are the ultimate weapon, and who pestered his mom for weeks to let him spend his allowance on that cheesy "Day Walker” sword he’s seen on the late-night Blade Network commercials. He also has this friend who owns a real Japanese katana with blade steel that has been folded, like, a million times…and that one time, his friend used it to do some sparring with that other dude who owned a claymore, and the katana, like, totally chopped through the other blade and cut it in half.
will the computer repair guy find porn on my pc
Yes, he will. He’ll also copy the best of it to his own flash drive for personal use, and forward the twisted stuff to all his computer repair buddies. Tech support folks know the company’s computer users by their individual fetish. You’re informally known not as “Bob from Accounting”, but as “Bukkake Bob.”
cocaine and horseradish taste similar
I’m going to have to take your word for it. With the price difference between a gram of each, you won’t find me spreading a layer of cocaine on my lunch sandwich any time soon. On the same note, snorting horseradish is probably stimulating, but most likely not in the same way as snorting cocaine.
eye-friendly background eggshell
Yes, I find eggshell-colored background easier on the eyes than standard white. My word processing application is usually set to slightly beige paper and dark gray font.
What is it with some people trying to find hot, sweaty guy-on-guy action on children’s TV these days? I swear, the way some people are obsessed with gay sex, you’d think they have some serious unacknowledged desires. Oh, and the Doodlebops aren’t gay, they’re just Canadian.
That’s the take for this week, folks. Tune in again next week for another round of Search! Term! Safari!