you may already be a wiener.

Just got another “winning notification” for a lottery in which I’ve never participated.  This one’s from Holland, and I’m giving the author bonus points for cheekiness: the name of the “Branch Officer incharge (sic)” is Mr. Van Gogh.

It seems that I have, at latest count, close to a quarter trillion dollars in unclaimed winnings and various orphaned savings accounts all over Europe and Africa.  Another year or two, and I’ll be able to cash in my chips and buy my own Wall Street bank.


3 thoughts on “you may already be a wiener.

  1. MarkHB says:

    I got my winning number today. It doesn’t make me any money. Actually, it’s just a government account for the money they take from me.

    But it means I can come home and do things now, rather than just come home and fuck around. I never thought I’d be so happy to have a Gubment Issued identification number, which I will have demanded of me for every significant action I want to perform.

    Countervailing emotions here. I can come home at last, and do my thing. Having taken of the Universal ID Number that will track my every move. At least I’m allowed to fight back in the US, that’s something… I suppose… as long as I don’t talk to loudly. Or piss off too many lobbyists. Or say anything unpopular, in public too much.

    I mean… that’s good, right?

  2. DJK says:

    What I always wonder when I get/delete those is… they just think we’ll fall for it because we’re stupid Americans or what? Who falls for that crap???

  3. anonymous says:

    Did you know that playing foreign lotteries is against federal law and a felony?

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