butchering a whole herd of holy cows.

I’ve had complaints about my lack of strictly gun-related posts lately, so I’ll address that complaint right now by talking a bit about guns.

On the Intertubes, nothing draws traffic like controversy.  Therefore, I have decided to generate some controversy among my gun-owning readers.  And what better way to do that than to talk smack about your particular favorite brand of gun?  And since I don’t know your particular preference, I shall now talk smack about a whole bunch of popular designs.

M14/M1A: Clunky, heavy, and overpowered.  Essentially a Garand tarted up with a removable magazine, in a half-baked attempt to adapt a 19th century rifle design philosophy to the mid-20th century.  Most often named as favorite infantry rifle by people who never had to hump a 10-pound wood-stocked rifle with lots of sharp protrusions and no collapsible anything on a three day exercise, or try to make it through a firefight with the standard battle load of five 20-round magazines.

AK-47: Crude and inaccurate bullet thrower designed by and for illiterate peasants.  Chambered in a caliber that manages to cut the ballistics of a proper .30-caliber battle rifle in half without passing on any weight savings to the grunt.  Ergonomics only suitable for Russian midgets.  Archaic cable trigger spring, crummy sights, no sight radius to speak of, no bolt hold-open device, and a clumsy safety.  Favorite infantry rifle of Middle Eastern goat herders, guys named Abdullah, and backwoods militia types who like the fact that it shoots cheap ammo and has ballistics like their familiar .30-30.

H&K G-3/HK-91: Ergonomics of a railroad tie.  No bolt release, and a locking system that requires three men and a mule to work the cocking handle.  Fluted chamber that mauls brass, and violent bolt motion that dings the brass that didn’t get mauled too badly by the chamber.  Stamped sheet metal construction, yet just as heavy as a milled steel M14.  Safety lever that requires unnaturally long thumbs, and a trigger pull that feels like dragging a piano across a gravel road with your index finger.  Favorite infantry rifle of Cold War nostalgics and third world commandos.

M-16/AR-15: Underpowered varmint rifle burdened by a crummy magazine design.  Nasty direct-impingement gas system that poops where it eats.  High sight line, flimsy alloy-and-plastic construction.  Generally favored by range commandos, tactical disciples, military vets who have never fired anything else for comparison, and Brownells addicts who a.) enjoy spending three times the cost on the rifle on bolt-on accoutrements, and b.) never have to use their rifle away from a dry, sunny range.

G-36: Flimsy plastic rifle with non-user adjustable fair-weather optics that fog up when a gnat farts in front of them.  Magazines that take up twice as much pouch space than others in the same caliber because of the "clever" coupling nubs on the magazine housing.  Skeleton folding stock that is about as suitable for butt-stroking as a plastic mess spork.  Twice as expensive as other rifles in its class because of the "HK" logo on the receiver.  Preferred infantry rifle of SWAT cops, and soldiers whose militaries haven’t been in shooting conflicts since the 1940s.

Glock: Butt-ugly plastic shooting appliance with the ergonomics of a caulking gun.  Five-pound trigger with no external safety makes it ill-suited for its target market (cops who shoot a hundred rounds a year for qualification).  Favored by gangbangers because the product name is short and rhymes with other short, rap-friendly words.

Beretta 92F/M9: Clunky and overweight rip-off of a clunky and overweight German design from the 1930s.  Shear-happy locking block, ergonomics that are only suited for linebackers, barely adequate sights that are partially non-replaceable, and low capacity for its size.  Favored by Eighties action movie fanatics and John Woo freaks.

1911: Overweight and overly complex piece of late 19th century technology.  Low capacity, useless sights in stock form, and a field-stripping procedure that requires three hands.  Favored by people who are at the cutting edge of handgun technology and combat shooting…of the 1960s.

H&K P7: Wildly overpriced, heavy for its size, low capacity in most iterations, and blessed with a finish that rusts if you give the gun a moist glance.  Gas tube has a tendency to roast the trigger finger after a box or two of ammo at the range.  Favored by gun snobs who think that paying twice as much for half the rounds means four times the fighting skill.

SIG Sauer: Top-heavy bricks with the rust resistance of an untreated iron nail at the bottom of a bucket of saltwater.  Ergonomically sound, if you have size XXL mitts.  Some minor parts made in Germany, so the manufacturer can charge 75% Teutonic Gnome Magic premium.  Favored by Jack Bauer fans and wannabe Sky Marshals/Secret Service agents.

Did I leave anyone out?  Feel free to add to the list.  Let’s not, however, have an argument about how very wrong I am about your favorite blaster, because, hey, I’m not.

Disclaimer: I’ve owned multiple copies of most of the designs mentioned above, and I think they’re all fine and dandy designs.  However, a good debater can take both sides of an argument at the drop of a hat, so take it as an exercise in debating skills, and try to pick nits about your particular darling.  Ready?  Go!

UPDATE:  Friend MattG has taken me to task for not butchering my own darlings as well.  Fair’s fair, so here’s a late addition to the list:

S&W Revolvers:  Archaic hand weapons from a bygone era, the missing link between flintlocks and autoloaders.  Low capacity, and reloading requires a lunch break.  Heavy for their capacity, unless you’re talking about airweight snubbies, which hurt as much on the giving end as they do on the receiving end.  Rare stoppages, but few malfunctions that don’t require gunsmith services, which are hard to come by in a gunfight.  Favored by crusty old farts who just now got around to trusting newfangled smokeless powder, and Dirty Harry fans with unrealistic ideas about the power of Magnum rounds vs. engine blocks.

SMLE/Enfield:  Refinement of a 19th century blackpowder design.  Weapon of choice for militaries who either couldn’t afford Mausers, or had ideological hangups about Kraut rifles.  Rimlock-prone cartridge that only barely classifies as a battle rifle round because of blackpowder derivation and insufficient lock strength of the platform.  Favored by Canadians with WWII nostalgia, and people who think that semi-auto rifles are a passing fad.

Browning HP:  Fragile frame designed around a popgun round.  Near-useless safety in stock form that’s only suitable for the thumbs of elementary schoolers.  Strangest and most circuitous way to trip a sear ever put into a handgun.  Favored by wannabe SAS commandos, wannabe mercenaries, and Anglophiles who think that hammer-down, chamber-empty carry is the most appropriate way to carry a defensive sidearm.

Benelli shotguns:  Plastic boutique scatterguns made by people with the martial acumen of dairy cows.  Hideously expensive, and therefore popular with police agencies that get their equipment financed by tax dollars. 

FN FAL:  Long and lightweight receiver that’s impossible to scope properly.  Overpowered round, twenty-round magazines that run dry in a blink, and an overall weapon length that’s only suitable for Napoleonic line infantry, but utterly useless for airborne and armored infantry.  Made by Belgians, a nation with a military history that is limited to waving German divisions through at the border.  Favored by Falklands veterans, Commonwealth fanboys, and people who think that dial-a-recoil gas systems are the epitome of infantry technology.

There.  Happy now?

140 thoughts on “butchering a whole herd of holy cows.

  1. lenf says:

    Perfect is the enemy of good.

  2. Keith says:

    I really expected something about the FN-FAL among the m14, ak, and hk91

  3. What?
    No revolver aspersions?

  4. Bitter says:

    SIG Sauer: Top-heavy bricks …

    I object! Your argument is factually inaccurate about my Sig. It’s not nearly as top heavy because it’s Massachusetts compliant – which basically means they cut a hole in the top.

    As for the other stuff, I hate 24 (MI-5 is my spy show of choice), and my hands are large for a chick. I can’t complain about the price since every MA compliant gun is overpriced.

  5. Phillip says:

    Let’s see… My carry gun is a Ruger P95. Heavy, chunky, ugly, and if you run out of ammo you can use it as a fairly suitable club. Has an accessory rail, but other than that has no tacti-kool features. Cheap gun, but it filled the need. Not the easiest thing to conceal, that’s for sure.

    My rifle’s an SKS, which I notice you didn’t mention. It’s a “Day after election day” purchase, and I haven’t even taken it to the range yet. It has a black plastic stock and removable magazines, which I’ve noticed are next to impossible to put in without opening the bolt. Which means you can’t store it with ammo in the mag but not in the chamber, unless you’re willing to put your finger down in the mag well to push the bullets down as you release the bolt. The safety is so basic I wouldn’t trust a round in the chamber unless my kids were in another state.

    B.U.G. is an NAA mini-revolver in .22 magnum. All I can say about that is: “Let the jokes begin.” Still better than harsh words, though.

  6. Jim says:

    What? Nothing about the Blast-o-matic 2000? Quite probably the epitome of firearms for the Mall-ninja sect worldwide.

  7. JIGSAW says:

    hahahaha – well said (to all, except the 1911, of course).

  8. BobG says:

    I’m with doubletrouble; what about some of my favorites, the wheelguns?

  9. ATLien says:

    A couple of things:

    I have a g3 clone and i love it. It purrs to me in German.

    They had semi-auto infantry rifles in the 19th century?

    And how many more rounds should my Beretta hold? It already holds 15+1! Even in 9mm that’s a lot of trouble to be in if you need more rounds than that.

  10. Rush Baby says:

    You left out anything Kimber and the Mosin Nagant.

  11. Shooter says:

    what about the😄 platform?

    and, yes, there should be a bit about the FN/FAL. I’d take the railroad tie over that thing any day.

  12. harp says:

    I still love the M-14. Yes, I had to hump with it. When I got to Nam I had to switch to the M-16. Never had any trouble with mine.
    You made no mention of the M-4. Or how about the old S&W Model 10? Colt Detective Special?
    M-1 Garand or M-1 Carbine?

  13. as others have said, looks like “ode to the wheel gun, the sequel”. praise by exclusion…what a concept!

    and in an act of selfless magnanimity i’d like to offer my services to dispose of any of those clunky unsophisticated lumps of hardware mentioned above…free! just send them along to me and be sure to include all those underpowered varmint rounds currently taking up valuable space…

    jtc

  14. I say there’s nothin’ ya need that can’t be handled by a single shot 12ga.

  15. Stingray says:

    CZ-75B – Comes with grips made of 3 parts teflon one part stiffener. Has the benefit of a magazine brake spring to make sure that an empty magazine will stay in the gun until pried out with a screwdriver and mule team. Removing this spring will assure damage to magazine lips for all inserted subsequently unless you pay the premium for a replacement flat spring that should’ve been in the gun in the first place. The safety lever is embedded in sea sponge to assure soft and mushy operation, and the double-action trigger pull was carefully calibrated to ensure that even a cop trying to draw the gun couldn’t pull it. Heavy enough to stretch even the thickest belt, this gun will serve admirably as a wheel chock for any known aircraft, or boat anchor for up to 500 tons displacement. Finally, a weapon suitable for “throw it at the bad guy when it’s empty,” since even if he tries to catch it, it’ll break his hand.

  16. Trebor says:

    The Garand is a “19th Century design?”

    Huh? How do you figure that? It was finalized in the early 1930’s and adopted in 1936. That’s pretty 20th Century to me. Not to mention that it was seen as revolutionary at the time, not anywhere near “old hat.”

    Btw, my favorite saying about the P7 is “Over engineered, over priced, and over hyped.”

  17. JKosprey says:

    M249 LMG

    Heavy, underpowered design, prone to jamming. Offers no advantage in ballistics over a regular infantry rifle, as abdul just laughs at the tiny “pop” of the varmint cartridge. Also feeds from badly designed M16 mags. Jams worse then.

    K-31….downright perfect. :-p

  18. brotio says:

    I thought it was against the law to dis the AK because of its ability to function no-matter-what.

    It’s the most unappealing gun to shoulder I’ve ever fired.

  19. divemedic says:

    I own 7 of the 9 you just wrote about. Funny stuff, there.

  20. […] my…Marko manages to offend most of the internet.  Cue fanboys in […]

  21. fastbike says:

    Hah, It’s true you’re a revolver snob. I would have expected a whack at the temple of S&W and the Colt SAA.

    However, outstanding snark, very efficient.

  22. Thad Adams says:

    Your eyes bled from holding back the laughter writing this, didn’t they….. ROFLMAO

  23. […] talks smack about your particular favorite gun. Heh. What, no […]

  24. J T Bolt says:

    All the stuff mentioned about the M-14 are features, not bugs.

    Except maybe the 100 round battle load.

  25. […] Marko says your favorite gun sucks. […]

  26. PolyKahr says:

    Everything you said about the 1911 is true! Its popularity shows that no one has come up with anything better, right?

    LOL, and good post.

    Regards,
    PolyKahr

  27. pdb says:

    Revolvers: Low capacity, heavy and expensive caveman weapons encumbered with a trigger pull as long as a Senate committee questioning. None of the common malfunctions are fixable without tools. Will jam up tighter than Hillary’s cooter if any foreign objects get into the works, which are helpfully naked to the world. Have to disassemble them to reload them, and you have to reload them A LOT. And now they come with locks!

    Mausers: Why use three cuts of the mill to machine the receiver when thirty will do? Despite the artistry and craftsmanship, have never been on the winning side of a war. Fascist extractor means that Rounds! Shall! Only! Be! Loaded! From! The! Magazine!, but comes in handy when you have to work the bolt while upside down because a lion is eating you. The people who most loudly proclaim this advantage have never hunted anything more threatening than an aggressive tree rat.

    H&K anything: Grab your ankles and brace yourself for some uncomprimising. If there’s a way we can screw over our customers, we will find it.

  28. aczarnowski says:

    Funny because it’s true. Like government, find the one that sucks the least for you.

  29. Drizzle says:

    S&W semiautos; mostly oversized and overweight, like so many aging football linemen. Much beloved by police administrators because their magazine disconnects saves countless lieutenants and captains paperwork when the troops didn’t shoot themselves in the leg going in and out of court or the jail ten times a day. Those same troops are now in need of workers comp and physical therapy on department time for muscle pulls related to both carrying these massively heavy weapons on their duty belts and carpal tunnel related injuries from either squeezing triggers with pulls measured in kilotons or releasing safeties positioned by ergonomically challenged designers with Terminator ™ length thumbs.

  30. You forgot the MOSIN’s!

    My M44 is great for the Apocalypse. The standard round acts three ways. Firstly, as a concussive grenade (anything forward of me will be deaf). Secondly as a flame thrower (10 ft flame!). Lastly as a rather inaccurate projectile, but this come tertiary to the aforementioned uses.

    When I run out of ammo (that can’t be reloaded with standard reloading supplies) I can stab people with the 20 foot long bayonnet and when that breaks it makes a WONDERFUL boat paddle.

    Not to mention it works great for bench press routines.

  31. Matt says:

    Given you’ve laid waste to all of the other major rifle designs in common use, I guess that means the FN FAL is a good rifle.

    Plus: Tolerate of abuse with adjustable gas system, rugged, long sight radius, powerful cartridge, modern carbines can collapse nicely.

    Minus: Same heavy battle load of the M14. Still, I’ll take the weight of 7-9 20 round FAL mags if I’m expecting trouble.

    Ahh, the perfect gun. 🙂

  32. Weer'd Beard says:

    The S&W J-Frame. Overweight for carry in steel form, Painful to shoot in Aluminum or Scandium, 5 shots of .38 Sp with a half-lenth guide rod to make reloading near impossible makes it horribly underpowered…too damn painful to practice on the .357 featherweights.

    Favored by people who enjoy carrying in the swimming pool and the shower, and write in gun magazines about it.

  33. Mikee says:

    The Ruger 10/22 has a stock made of balsa wood, dentable using only a sharp glance. The action, although inexpensive to manufacture, is nearly impossible to clean due to the sharp interior corners. The whippy lightweight barrel heats up after about 0.5 shots and leads to stringing shots thereafter. The “revolutionary” (bad pun) rotary magazine allows you to know if there is between one and ten rounds loaded, which is considered “close enough.” The trigger is easily replaced, which is the best that can be said about it.

    All the above has spawned an aftermarket industry that resembles Santa’s workshop at 11pm Christmas eve. However, the aftermarket parts will each individually cost more than the whole rifle’s original price.

    One can, however, get a tarted-up sample from the OEM for only 3 to 5 times the price of the base model.

  34. Wild Deuce says:

    Whew! I thought he was serious until he got to the 1911.

  35. Sean says:

    Wish I could come up with any as good as these – loved reading it and picturing the wild gesticulations at each one from somewhere on the interwebs….

    Thanks Marko, well done!

  36. Mikee says:

    The Ruger Mark III 22LR pistol follows the Mark II and Mark I, with useful renovations such as the loaded chamber indicator (more places for gunpowder residue to accumulate), a magazine disconnect (to keep the world safe from the mighty 22LR bullets, and to make impossible the use of Mark II magazines in the new gun), and an increased price to pay for the above extra special features. This firearm also has a very long warning label on the barrel that should be read in full before firing each shot, to allow the barrel to cool back down to room temperature. Oh, and you can lock the action using a special hex-wrench-like key that will disappear if you ever do use it, at which point you will learn it is not in fact a hex wrench of any size made by humans in this universe.

    All this builds on the original features of the renowned Mark I and Mark II, which were famous for being very heavy, having a Luger-like grip angle (because who doesn’t want their first handgun to look like a Nazi relic?), a wonderfully useless grip-heel magazine release, an atrocious trigger (which like the 10/22 can be aftermarket-replaced for the price of another gun), and of course the wonderful Ruger logo on the grip panels. The color of the logo is of great concern to enthusiasts who can tell you if Bill Ruger was alive or dead when the gun was made.

  37. Tam says:

    I’ve been on the intarw3bz long enough to know the truth:

    My guns rule.

    Your guns suck.

  38. Rick in NY says:

    Marko, you didn’t mention the premier all-plastic underpowered rattlecan from Belgium, the FN PS-90.

    50 round magazine…. of a round slightly more powerful than a 22lr, less powerful than a 22 hornet, kinda like a centerfire 22 magnum. Bullpup design, whoever thought of it should be educated, hopefully with excrutiating pain. Funky grips, zero use as a club after you empty that 50 round mag and the BG is still coming, and finally, a kings’ ransome to buy one. Of course, you can buy a pistol that uses the same round, so you only have to carry one type of ammo. Unfortunately, the mags do not interchange…..

    JKosprey, I agree about the K31, just about perfect… As long as you overlook the near inability to add an optical sight, six-round magazine, and screen-door trigger.

    Okay, it was ahead of it’s time, and is still a great rifle 75 years later, I’m just picking. BTW, used mine to get three deer this year, took 3 shots to do it too.

  39. BryanP says:

    If he didn’t mention your favorite gun that means it sucks so bad that there was no point even bringing it up.

  40. Allan says:

    Ruger Mk1: Take it apart once and you’re done… might as well toss it into the corner as attempt the reassembly.

    Walther PPK: One shot and kiss your thumb knuckle goodbye.

  41. Excellent work, sir.

    Rick in NY — I’ve seen, but don’t know anything about, aperture sights listed at Mojo for the K31. (Or were you looking for a scope or dot?)

    As I don’t have, and am unlikely to obtain, the funds for an EBR soon, I’m thinking seriously about a K31 and getting Mojo sights and the semi-legendary LH conversion kit for the bolt.

  42. Matt G says:

    In good faith, Marko, I must demand that you also include your beloved K-frames.🙂

    I’ve others:

    Remington 870: Heavy, very easy to short-stroke while very difficult to bring back into battle once a shell’s out of the magazine and under the closed bolt, front-heavy, questionable cross-bolt safety, very slow turn-of-the-last-century technology that is neither more reliable than modern autoguns nor absorbs any recoil. Requires two hands to operate.

    Winchester M94: Requires two hands to operate. Tubular magazine disallows good spitzers that it frankly isn’t accurate enough to appreciate, anyway. Comes from the factory with a short sight radius, and poor triggers. Now comes with an unnecessary yet effective hammerblock safety that will allow you to drop the hammer and make a loud “clack.”

    Marlin M336: Admittedly accurate, it suffers the M94’s other drawbacks while being too tight to function with the smoothness of the Winchester.

    Pre-’64 Model 70’s: Some of them are really accurate. Many aren’t. Because they were so hand-fitted and produced back in those days, you had to play the lottery for a good one. If you got one of good ol’ Bob’s handiwork from a Monday, when he was hungover from the weekend, or from a Friday, when he was screwing off in anticipation of the weekend, you were screwed.
    __________
    Say! This is fun! It’s like looking in the mirror and having a good belly laugh at my own sad features.

  43. kaveman says:

    I admit I only skimmed a bit but I had to respond to this myth.

    The AK-47 has no bolt hold-open device.

    This is not true.

    Procedure:

    1. Safety first, remove magazine and make sure chamber is clear.
    2. Pull and hold bolt to the rear.
    3. Fully depress trigger and hold.
    4. Slowly allow bolt to move forward until you feel it encounter resistence(very short distance).
    5. Release trigger.
    6. Let go of bolt and it will stay in place.
    7. To undo, simply rack the bolt.

    Try it for yourself, it works.

  44. […] Taurus Sanctus” In The Open… Shooter Will Adjust. 03Dec08 If you want to start a dust up, do it right!  That’s what I say.   […]

  45. gunblobber says:

    It is super easy to scope a K31.

    http://www.brownells.com/aspx/NS/Store/ProductDetail.aspx?p=1666

    Also sold elsewhere.

  46. Dan says:

    Excellent write up. I’m sick of reading reviews about how great every single gun is without mention of even the most obvious flaws.

  47. Sigivald says:

    Crude and inaccurate bullet thrower designed by and for illiterate peasants.

    I must insist you retract that calumnious libel, sir!

    Mikhail Kalashnikov was and is perfectly literate.

    (I notice you didn’t ding the AG-42B, thus proving it to be the perfect rifle.)

  48. redeux says:

    i’m glad my H&K P2000SK is perfect and has none of the faults of other products listed above…
    and the M1 carbine just keeps going after 64 years of use and abuse…

  49. tom says:

    You forgot Galils, Israeli/RSA mod of Valmet/Kalashnikov ideas, BUT, it offsets mangling all your brass by having a built in beer bottle opener so the troops would stop wrecking mag wells opening bottles. Reasonably accurate though heavy. Marginally controllable FA in 7.62 form. Third round and you’re likely in AA gunner mode.

  50. tom says:

    Oh, if people are going to speak ill of Ruger Mk I-III pistols one must own a couple Whitney Wolverines as I do. You need a 22 round to pull down the mag follower because it doesn’t have an integral thumb stud like the Rugers and is want to, if you have pulled the follower too far down as you load the magazine, let bullets tumble into the magazine facing backwards or fall out the open slots on either side, which happens regularly but is almost impossible to make happen when a round decides to land in the magazine facing backwards. they do, however point nicely and the magazine isn’t that big of an issue because you don’t mess with it much as the abortion of a magazine release is almost impossible to operate with sweaty hands and with dry hands it makes your thumb bleed until you build callouses.

  51. McThag says:

    Colt Anaconda: Everything that’s wrong with the S&W .44 plus less positive locking for the cylinder.

    For people who only want one gun like this, but have enough money for two S&W and don’t want to have any left over after the purchase.

  52. Seth from Massachusetts says:

    You forgot the single worst part of the AK. The single most inconviently located safety in all of gun-dom.

  53. Mikee says:

    And I second the author who noted that the Ruger Mark I, II, III models, including those 22/45 fiberglass-shedding models, require a bent paper clip to disassemble and a review of the directions (and several tries) to reassemble.

  54. DirtCrashr says:

    M1898Krag – Smooth as owl-shit on glass Victorian bolt action pike-holder that can’t be loaded quickly by any means and will get you killed by a short Spaniard or Ginzu’d by an amok Moro tribesman, it forced the obsolete single-action 1873 Colt .45 to make a comeback.

  55. Ed Foster says:

    PDB, Good point! The last war the krauts won was in 1870-71, against the French, and they almost lost that.
    Sigivald, I must agree Kalashnikov was a bright man. Consider: He takes an M-1 Garand bolt, turns it upside down so he can stick an STG-44 type mag in without running foul of the gas system, and then, the thing of beauty.
    Knowing that the Politburo all hunt with Remington Model 8’s in caliber .30 Rem, he sticks it into a barely modified Model 8 reciever, and makes the safety even bigger and stiffer so Boris the beet plucker can find it in the dark.
    Something I and many other men have thanked his ghost for often. Have you ever heard somebody snapping off an AK safety at 20 yards?
    Lousy weapons design, but great politics in a police state.

  56. tom says:

    Have you ever seen an insurgent carry an AK on safe?

    Is it time yet for the Liberian Infantry Tactics Review?

    http://www.fmft.net/archives/001463.html

    Recommended skill sets to learn to use with some of the above mentioned arms.

  57. El Baboso says:

    The 1911, the finest close-quarter battle implement ever devised, and the King of the feedway stoppage.

  58. Larry Patty says:

    Don’t diss my Beretta! I’ll have you know it also makes for a great blade weapon. All you need to do is to convince an assailant to take in their weak hand and try to fire it with part of their hand above the backstrap. It will cut them so badly they will need stitches!. I know, I’ve seen it happen. Fortunately, not to me.

  59. tom says:

    The other advantage of a Duty/92 Beretta, is if you point one at me at close range I can deflect it to the side and walk away with your slide and barrel with the flick of my thumb.

    Study field stripping the 92FollySham and engage in close quarters usage of it with somebody else who’s studied it. Make sure it’s empty, not that you’d get a round in a person if they were within 5 yards and you hadn’t decided for sure to shoot them. Even if you shoot them, .355 isn’t that big of a hole and you can lose a lot of blood before you lose the ability to fight.

    Your opponent will dance around you with half your firearm in his hand and the magazine capacity won’t mean a thing other than making it a slightly heavier poorman’s club with some sharp edges on it.

    It’s omething Beretta doesn’t advertise. Makes for easy field stripping and quite possibly fatal in a close quarters/hand to hand battle.

    We’ve practiced this locally for giggles with some of my police instructor friends and I can deflect your wonder 9 and walk away with half your gun in under a second, still leaving me with a free hand to break your nose or draw my own sidearm.

    Italian technology….

    • john says:

      this is sidewalk commando gibberish. I spent years as a marine corps pmi. If I decided to shoot you with my M9 , from 7yds and in I’d shoot you in the face. Not to mention the draw is taught straight up and flip to fire position so you can shoot as you bring the weapon forward. I’d bet good money that someone trying to field strip my pistol as I’m shooting at them would just end up with lots of .355 holes therefore bleeding alot.

  60. Marko says:

    Tom,

    that, my friend, is an urban legend. If you Google the Lethal Weapon 4 screenshots where Jet LI does just that, you’ll see that the Beretta’s take-down lever is already conveniently rotated down into the field-strip position.

    Anyone who’s slow and dumb enough to let an assailant turn the takedown lever on his Beretta ( a feat that requires two hands, or at least a hold on both sides of the frame) deserves to get beaten to death with his own slide.

  61. enough “traffic” for you? fait accompli!

    but as i perused the updates and new comments wifey flipped on the boob tube and what was on but a marathon of “a Christmas story”…

    ah, the perfect firearm…my daisy red ryder held a bajillion rounds and performed its chores impeccably as it and i scoured the surrounding sugarcane fields dispatching unfortunate varmints and honing my target skills as i perfected the “lob”.

    dare anyone here dispute my fond reminisce? i didn’t think so…for firearms perfection, like beauty, is in the eye, the hand, the heart, and the memory, of the holder and the beholder.

    jtc

  62. tom says:

    Not an urban legend. Come with me to my Texas DPS firearm’s instructor’s house and see. He can do it in half a second from close range. Depends on hand strength but it’s doable. Much more easily doable than taking apart the Kimber I carry.

    • john says:

      Your firearms instructor has obviously never faced someone trained in the proper use of the M9. I think he’s pulling your chain anyway.

  63. tom says:

    Requires a deflecting hand on the wrist or gun and a strong other hand. End of story. Not movie bullshit.

    FWIW: I’ll let you come down to the Central Texas with snapper caps in your gun and pay your accomodations if Cal, Mark, and I can’t repeatedly pull off the feat, proving you wrong. Otherwise you provide your own accommodations and a really good case of single malt? Islay is preferred.

  64. Wild Deuce says:

    Tom is correct, it can be done. However, one can prepare ahead of time and “fix” the gun to prevent disassembly during a gun grab. Weapon retention is another matter for the owner to train on.

  65. owen says:

    what no comments on the XD?

  66. Don Meaker says:

    cap and ball revolver…
    Gives the last word on slow to load. Chambered for six but safe with none, partly safe with 5 chambers loaded, if leave off the caps, and avoid sparks. Black powder adds a fourth to the triple threat (if the bullets miss, the muzzle flash should set your goblin on fire, if that doesn’t work, its a darned good club. With black powder you create a proper smoke screen to hide your withdrawal.

    On the other hand, it was recognized as changing cavalry tactics, making sabers or lances obsolete.

  67. tom says:

    Wild Deuce

    Some of us practice “weapon removal” as often, if not more often than “weapon retention.”

    It’s the difference between the:
    “If this happens I might do this” mindset

    and the

    “When this happens I will do this” mindset.

    Keep her shiny side up and keep yourself from acquiring any bleedy holes if avoidable.

    Cheers,
    Tom

  68. Matt G says:

    Uh, Owen? The😄 hasn’t been around long enough to be anybody’s sacred cow.

    Hey Marko, didja forget that the P35 often comes with a stupid magazine safety? (ack! All the drawbacks of reloading a revolver…)

    And I would want to mention the amazing warp in physics managed by the Lee-Enfield, in which they managed to take a moderate-powered cartridge, put it into a hellaciously-heavy rifle (even the detachable 10 round magazines weigh a young tonne), yet somehow, by virtue of crappy stock design, managed to to produce a rifle that kicks like a Tennessee mule.

  69. Matt G says:

    Redux said:
    “and the M1 carbine just keeps going after 64 years of use and abuse…”

    Oh, man– really? Come on! The jokes just write themselves!

    M1 Carbine– Heavier and bulkier than pistol, but unable to outperform a hot .357 in stopping power. Because it’s nominally a long gun, it fools people into thinking that they’re adequately armed, even though it’s insufficient for whitetail deer hunting. Tiny safety, a rear sight that drifts up and down, and enormous variation of quality control from version to version. You’ll find yourself thanking Vishnu for a 6″ group at 100 yards… at which distance the only animal it could reliably kill could stand up in the middle of your group and likely be unscathed. At least the ammunition for it is cheap… Oh wait. . . it’s not, either. This carbine is beloved by people who like or have to carry a rifle, without any regard to what should happen if they might have to fire it.

  70. clifford says:

    You forgot the…

    Steyr AUG: A study in curvilinear plastic, this bullpup design was initially rejected George Lucas (it didn’t look very menacing) before being picked up by the Austrians (who don’t want to look very menacing). The design is so unusual that most people don’t believe its an actual rifle – a real one can be taken to an Airsoft gathering and no one will know the difference. In a pinch can be used as a tomato trellis. The bullpup design is a great way for left-handers to remove unwanted teeth, and the transparent plastic magazines ensure that your enemy always knows many rounds you have left. The AUG has been adopted by the Irish and Australians, both of whom accidently thought ‘AUG’ was a brand of beer. Not a lot were imported into the US, so a buying one today will cost you the price of a small house. A favorite of snobby gun elitists, FPS gamers, and people who download ‘Falco’ songs off iTunes.

  71. Brian Dale says:

    Ahhh, I wrote this before I read the Comments. Matt G’s more concise than I am, and he’s probably smarter, too.

    More on the Remington 870: Snob appeal for populists. Proof that design for ease of manufacture can be sold (over nine million times!) to the public as elegant simplicity. Also sold as the height of sophistication to people who see indoor plumbing as a waste of good money. As complex as a toilet, and the Express version has its metal finished about like a drain pipe. The Wingmaster garners praise for its beauty, as though it were a hammer designed by Leonardo da Vinci. There’s also the Police version, popular with – you guessed it – police departments and wannabes because of its durability (give a cop a chunk of re-bar, leave him unsupervised and when you get it back it’ll be broken). Countless 870 owners dream of out-shooting someone with a pretty double-barrelled gun on clay birds so that they can write about it on the Net.

  72. […] Your favorite gun sucks. Updated. […]

  73. Rick in NY says:

    Oldsmoblogger and Gunblobber,

    Actually, I do have a scope on my K31. Since I didn’t want to alter such a nice rifle in any way, (Walnut stock, excellent condition, no import marks, all matching #s…) I did some digging and found a company in PA that sells a no-drill sight mount for the Swiss, and a lot of other old mil-surps.

    http://www.scopemounts.com

    S&K makes some great mounts, rock solid, and simple to install and remove. My Swiss now wears a Leupold 4x pistol scope, mounted scout style.

  74. Wild Deuce says:

    Tom,

    You are absolutely correct. I would hope that most readers would understand that weapon retention training involves just as much disarming training as well. You are better served knowing both ends.

    My brother is a firefighter. He has always said that the best firefighters at doing overhaul (dismantling doors, windows, walls, floors, ceilings … a building) in search of hidden fire, are usually the guys that work on the side as carpenters and tradesmen in the construction business. They know how to put it together … they know how to take it apart.

    All else being equal, a master in disarming technique should be able to beat a master in retention. The laws of action/reaction pretty much dictate as much.

  75. redeux says:

    Matt G
    December 4, 2008 at 1:13 am

    “Oh, man– really? Come on! The jokes just write themselves!

    M1 Carbine– Heavier and bulkier than pistol, but unable to outperform a hot .357 in stopping power. Because it’s nominally a long gun, it fools people into thinking that they’re adequately armed, even though it’s insufficient for whitetail deer hunting. Tiny safety, a rear sight that drifts up and down, and enormous variation of quality control from version to version. You’ll find yourself thanking Vishnu for a 6″ group at 100 yards… at which distance the only animal it could reliably kill could stand up in the middle of your group and likely be unscathed. At least the ammunition for it is cheap… Oh wait. . . it’s not, either. This carbine is beloved by people who like or have to carry a rifle, without any regard to what should happen if they might have to fire it.”

    how odd that i have never seen any of the problems you list in 40 years of carrying , shooting , and hunting with a carbine…
    other than a friends plainfield copy making like a grenade on factory ammo , theres never been a problem , and a decent JHSP is good for deer (if you can shoot ) out to about 125 yards…
    i have no problems with the carbine unlike some more modern designs that should never have left the toolroom…

  76. anon says:

    Mosin Nagant – The answer to the question: “What happens when you beat a sword into a plowshare, let it rust, then beat it into a rifle that uses ammo so corrosive that not cleaning it for a few hours after a day at the range leaves it suitable only for use as a tomato stake?”

  77. Andrew says:

    Kick that hornet’s nest Marko! Brilliantly conceived and executed!:-)

  78. nugun says:

    Ruger MK III

    Beautiful and accurate .22. Ruger toughness and reliability. But you need this because it’s near impossible to disassemble and reassemble for cleaning. MKIII also qualifies as a nice Christmas gift for that friend who just loves annoying brain puzzles.

    Ruger P-9x handguns. Reliable accurate bricks. Provides a last shot option of throwing the handgun at a target.

    ***

    Glock…in order to clean…pull trigger.

  79. Mikee says:

    No review of the Lee Enfield should omit that the first few versions came with the very useful single shot cutoff device, to prevent those wasteful soldiers from wasting more than one bullet at a time in massed volley fire….

  80. Larry Patty says:

    “We’ve practiced this locally for giggles with some of my police instructor friends and I can deflect your wonder 9 and walk away with half your gun in under a second, still leaving me with a free hand to break your nose or draw my own sidearm.”

    That’s assuming I wait for you to get within 15 feet of me before I open fire. I’m really not that nice!

  81. MarkHB says:

    Well, it looks like I’m still safe with the Webley .455 Wogstopper then!

  82. igli1969 says:

    A few quibbles. I have a CZ-75B SA (single action only). Yes, it’s heavy. But it’s very accurate, and after having an extraction problem repaired, no malfs in the last 1,000 rounds or so.

    Never had a problem with my S&W 625 (.45). Again, very accurate, heavy enough to bring back on target quickly, and a very smooth trigger pull.

    I’ll be interested in seeing the knocks on the XDm when they’ve been around a while. Mine (.40) is a dream so far, except the trigger could use a little work.

    A 1911 may have a small (compared to more modern guns) magazine, but if you have a good version (Kimber), you may not need that many rounds. And it *is* a good hammer.

  83. […] Your favorite gun sucks, too. […]

  84. tom says:

    Larry,

    I can lose a half gallon of blood and still do it. I’m not that nice either, most especially if I figure I’m dead anyway.

  85. KingsideRook says:

    I’m glad to see that the funny post about many common weapon’s shortfalls and quirks has turned into a deadly serious discussion of how badass and Bruce-Lee fast one has to be to perform Kung-Fu Beretta disassembly. I expect nothing less of my Thurday Night Internets.

    KsR

  86. Matt G says:

    Oh, for heaven’s sake, Redeux– I love my M1 Carbine, too, and I’ve shot multigun matches with it and smoked the guys with ARs. It’s handy as a pocket on a shirt, and quick to fire, and… wait! I’m not here to brag on guns! I’m here to BAG on ’em.

    But my 1943 vintage GM carbine suffers all the problems that I mentioned. (es, I can actually shoot.) If the goal is to hit a piece of typing paper every time, I can do that out to 100 yards. If the goal is to make a recognizable group at that distance, you’re SOL. Maybe yours shoots better; see my comments about variance in quality control.🙂 But for a caliber that marginal, there is NO WAY I’d shoot at a deer-sized critter at 100 yards or more; I respect the game too much. Have a lot of deer died to .30 carbines? Sure. But it had to do more with how many went afield, as the cheap and handy guns hit the market. And you’ve got to admit that the ammo’s overpriced.

  87. Bunnyman says:

    One more point on the SIG: A slide lock that will hold the slide back on the last round, as long as you carefully train your right thumb to be in the least natural place possible.

  88. Tam says:

    It’s so cute to see the folks who get all butthurt when their pet toy gets named.

  89. Tam says:

    PS: I had no idear there were so many ninjas on the intertubes. Why ain’t y’all out killing pirates?

    PPS: Yes, I can yank a 92’s slide off with one hand. If I grab it just right. Try that crap with one held by anyone competent and they’ll light you up like a Christmas tree, and I don’t care how much of a badass your DPS instructor was.

    I can think of about a million things more worthwhile to practice than fieldstripping Berettas someone else is holding. Macrame, for instance.

    Thank god the stickup artist is using a Beretta, standing within five yards, and doesn’t know ‘retention position’; I’d hate to think I wasted those hours in the dojo for nothing!

    PPPS: KingsideRook wins the intertubes!

  90. redeux says:

    Matt G
    December 5, 2008 at 3:04 am
    “Oh, for heaven’s sake, Redeux– I love my M1 Carbine, too,/ And you’ve got to admit that the ammo’s overpriced.”

    no arguments here , i just get tired of the ‘yours is a pos , mines perfect’ BS that goes around the net …
    as for the ’92’ , i won’t even touch that subject , having owned several , i have nothing good to say…
    same for asst’d plastic kaboomer’s , and various abortions of JMB’s (hnbp) invention…
    its all ‘toys’ until the lead starts flying in both directions , then you better hope your choice bloody well works…
    choose well…

  91. Mithras61 says:

    Springfield😄 – All the advantages of a scissor safety on a long and mushy trigger combined with a too-short backstrap safety that prevents you from racking the slide without a full combat grip. Best of all, the original design requires that you pull the trigger to remove the slide, thus ensuring one way or another that the chamber is empty when cleaning it.

    Available in all your favorite pistol chamberings from small & ineffective (9mm), to overpriced and deafening (.40 S&W, .357SIG), to not enough of them in a single magazine (.45ACP).

  92. theflatwhite says:

    Yes, you have been slacking off on firearms topics of late. So, thank you. I think.

  93. Rick in NY says:

    Matt G.

    “But my 1943 vintage GM carbine suffers all the problems that I mentioned.”

    Well, it IS a GM product afterall.

    Sorry, couldn’t resist.

  94. VirgineeGuy says:

    Great stuff, thanks!

    C’mon, go ahead and include the😄, just to tick off Rob & the boys.

    “Springfield😄, no it really isn’t a top-heavy attempt to copy a Glock. Really, it isn’t!!”

  95. Ahab says:

    Oh my lord, people actually train to try and fieldstrip a Beretta with one hand, Jet-Li style?

    AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA OH MY GOD.

    I guess you’re assuming that the guy whose gun you’re trying to take apart is just going to stand there and not try and fight back? Or that he’s going to be holding his gun in one hand, weakly, and not oh I don’t know, react oddly when you start trying to grab it?

    Man, that is some funny shit.

  96. tom says:

    We aim to please, with precision optics when need be. It’s still a design flaw and you get a couple armorers, instructors and gunsmiths together and odd things can happen because somebody says “I wonder if?”

    I suppose you’ll now make fun of the V-8 6N tractor we built because somebody suggested a 427 wouldn’t fit so we could do wheelies because that’s not as interesting as macrame to Tam…

    Assuming the average CRIMINAL has much knowledge at all of the gun in their hands is actually the laughable thing in this thread.

    Next you can tell me you can’t lock up a DA revolver by grabbing the wheel as you deflect it…

  97. tom says:

    Make it a good lockup and lock wheel while thumb over back of hammer.

    Ghetto kids don’t learn these things playing grand theft auto at home.

  98. Brian Dale says:

    Tam, you inquired:

    “PS: I had no idear there were so many ninjas on the intertubes. Why ain’t y’all out killing pirates?”

    That’s cuz they’re askeert of us…

  99. nonanon says:

    wanted to take you to an even hundred…

  100. Strings says:

    And I just thought I’d take it over 100…

    Yes, you CAN disassemble the 92 one-handed: you just have to hope the guy holding it isn’t fighting back. Even more fun with Pete’s design is to try and detail strip it (requires the use of a haz-mat box, so you don’t loose pieces)…

  101. Tam says:

    Tom,

    Whoa! You hang out with gunsmiths and instructors?

    I’m sorry, I thought you were a Counterstrike kiddie. I retract any bad thoughts I had about you being a bloviating poseur.

  102. Reuben says:

    I’ve got it! —- Tacitcool slide blades, that will stop the mall ninjas from de-topping your weapon. I’ll be a millionaire.

  103. tom says:

    Tam,

    I am a gunsmith. We disagreed on your board about some things regarding 1911 safeties but I didn’t call you names. I’m odd that way, generally polite. You could try it. FWIW, I’ve not played a video game since Galaga was new in the arcades. I’m OLD.

    As I recall that discourse was civil. Why should this one be different?

  104. tom says:

    Thinking further on the topic…leaving useful advice about how to get Sniders and Martinis to actually group on Tam’s board is “cool” but pointing out a flaw, in my opinion, in a particular firearm’s design makes me a middle aged mall ninja.

    Strings: I’ve never had a problem getting a Ruger .22LR pistol apart and back together and it doesn’t launch parts, unlike some who have posted here, but I use a “disassembly box” with 92s to avoid spending time on my hands and knees “praying to the gods of gunsmithing” with a large magnet and hope in my heart.

    Something I forgot to mention regarding disparaging the Whitney Wolverine. Very easy to take apart, push a button in and unscrew a barrel nut, then it comes apart BUT the first time you take one apart you will lose the firing pin lock and never find it even in a confined environment and have to order a new one.

  105. Reuben says:

    Tam may have said it, but I was definitely thinking it. I wondered a bit after your first post if you where being cheeky, but your follow ups removed that doubt.

    What is it that made me think this? The lofty assertions, and credential waving.

    Now, I do understand it is possible, but possible and probable are two completely differnet things. For example it is actually easier to drop the mag from almost all pistols than to remove the slide from one specific type of pistol.

    If this is such a problem then how many de-slidings have there been at your local PD? How many at the state or national level?

  106. tom says:

    All it takes it one.

    Design flaw. Just as much of a design flaw as real Uzis having a habit of going bang if you drop them.

    If you wish to defend what I consider a design flaw, you are welcome to do it.

    You aren’t going to hurt my feelings anymore than the people that get pissy when I point out that a lot of Pre-64 Model 70s didn’t shoot well out of the box and, on the other hand, that the Remington 721/722 was one of the best bolt rifle actions of all time and is overlooked by almost everyone.

  107. Reuben says:

    Where is this one time then? When did it happen in the real world, not a dry fire act of gun-fu?

  108. tom says:

    I never realized people could get so obsessively hurt about me pointing out a design flaw (which cognizant owners rectify) of one of the least interesting semi-automatic pistols of the past 100 years.

    This is pretty funny.

    Possibly funnier than the whole “your gun sucks” premise, if not on equal footing.

  109. Marko says:

    The small, but crucial difference is that only one of us is trying to be serious.

  110. john says:

    I like a FAL-type rifle pretty well, if it has an SLR-type (British) safety.

    Good one, Marko. Happy holidays, friend.

  111. tom says:

    I apologize to you and your family for taking you seriously, Marko.

    I shall endeavor to refrain from that error in the future.

    FWIW: I go to the range, not watch movies because I tend to get bored and walk out, so I was entirely unaware it had been done in a picture show.

    Cheers,

  112. tom says:

    While I’m hear spreading truth and slagging off on things and guns:

    The Bersa Thunder CCW is not a bad package for a DA/SA concealed gun as far as performance other than the fact that it has gutter sights, a barely operable safety with dry hands, and stovepipes every third round on a good day with stock FMJ ammo. I might have one for sale if somebody wishes to try for themselves.

    In a recent tournament, I decided to try the “backup, backup” for competitive porpoises. It’s hard to win a trophy when your shots were mostly on target but you only got off 38 rounds when everybody else got off 50 in the alloted exercises.

    I’ll give it credit that the trigger isn’t too creepy, the SA trigger is pretty nice, it’s easy to clean, and it always fires the first shot. The other 7 rounds cycling through it is sort of a guessing game using Bersa factory magazines. I’m sure it’d be even more reliable with discount aftermarket mags.

  113. […] only does your favorite gun suck, but your favorite ammo sucks […]

  114. Chris says:

    Marko, you realize that you started a war down here in Texas by slandering everyone’s beloved 1911s? We’re fixin’ to send Chuck Norris up there to disabuse you of the notion. He only comes in one caliber – .45 ACP.
    😀

  115. redeux says:

    when you have to spend anywhere from $200-2000.00 on a nib gun to make it function reliably with the ammo it was designed for , shouldn’t there be a clue that maybe something ain’t right ?
    thats how it is with all modern (post WW2) 1911’s …
    crap begets crap…
    had more 1911’s than most people handle in a lifetime , in the end i wasn’t impressed …
    any* ruger p-series is more reliable than current production 1911’s…
    been there done that for 40 years now , won’t be going back …
    JMB would cry if he could see what they’ve done with his original design…

    *(excepting pos p85 type 1’s)

  116. […] funny… butchering a whole herd of holy cows. the munchkin wrangler. __________________ Hk USP – what a Glock would be if allowed gestate in the womb till full […]

  117. Mark says:

    Excellent, very entertaining reading.
    Thanks!

  118. […] hsoi on February 12, 2009 Oh t3h interwebtubes are rife with endless debate about gun stuff, from your choice of gun sucks to your caliber sucks and every possible debate in […]

  119. dummidumbwit says:

    I like to look at the affects of the technical developments of firearms on politics, the Baker rifle and Napoleon, the Winchester and the American west, the AK 47 and the Cold War, the M1 Garrand and the 2nd World War, the French Needle gun and Western Civilization, but planes Tanks and Railroad Locomotives are neat also??

  120. James says:

    lets see… you left out the F2000, the AK-108 (the newest AK) FAMAS, Steyr AUG, SAR-21, L85, you left out some real good ones that have a whole lot of complaints. you want a complaint from me, why is it that Japan has yet to come out with anything short of a M16 knock off.

  121. dummidumbwit says:

    W/o denigrating the AK, the Japanese probably brought into the concept of lighter (aka more) ammo argument of the US military, sure it would be nice if they developed a whole new weapon, but I sense a disrespect of the M16 that may not be universally shared?

  122. James says:

    don’t get me wrong the M-16/AR-15 is a good gun. i just think the if the Austrians, the germans, the belgians and most other nations can at least try for something ells then so can the Japanese. I have to say that i like the 6.5mm Grendel more than the 5.56x 45mm NATO. and that would be an easy mod for most 5.56 weapons.

  123. dummidumbwit says:

    I think it may eventually come, but the screaming about the end of the world we’ll have to go through till they get all the bugs out of the new general issue weapon will horrify everyone again, progress being marked by smoking holes in the ground.

  124. Mikee says:

    And those phasers from Star Trek: Kirk routinely leapt out of the way of the shots.

    I think, and hope even Marko can agree, that the Red Rider BB Gun comment wins the analytical portion of the thread, with zero followup comments objecting to the Daisy’s perfection.

  125. dummidumbwit says:

    http://dummidumbwit.wordpress.com/2009/02/11/10017/
    Munchkin Liberation Army Strikes Again!!
    Free MiniMe!!!

  126. […] butchering a whole herd of holy cows. « the munchkin wrangler. […]

  127. 17rounds says:

    I’m glad my Springfield XDm didn’t get dissed. After using various Glocks, a 1911, and a .40 Browning Hi-Power for my carry gun, the XDm in .40 seems to be the best. 16+1 of compromise between the .45 and the ubiquitous 9mm, and other than a trigger job and having to tape the grip safety down, I couldn’t be happier with it. But let’s see, something negative… yeah, it’s tupperware, but I like it. Accurate, reliable, fits my hand.

  128. Ulf69 says:

    M: A slight inaccuracy in the Hk91/G3 platform with which I am quite familiar: The Bolt release IS the cocking handle…after the last round, you pull it back and up into the retaining notch, de-mag then re-mag, and slap that bitch down!

    • Marko Kloos says:

      The only “H&K Slap” we learned in the military was the one we got on the back of the head from the drill instructor if we slapped down that cocking handle. Do that to a rifle a few thousand times (say, by successive waves of recruits), and the metal in front of the arrestor notch will wear out.

  129. […] butchering a whole herd of holy cows. the munchkin wrangler. sacred cows, the second serving. the munchkin wrangler.   __________________   I like CHOCOLATE MILK! TGO CODE OF CONDUCT VIOLATORKNOXVILLE ORIGINAL […]

  130. Tam says:

    allegedly originally from
    LT Bruce Braxton
    Master Instructor Trainer
    College Park (GA) Police Dept.

    Obviously Lt. Braxton is kin to Maj. Caudill.

  131. […] Tip (Better late than never): The Munchkin Wrangler – Part1 and […]

  132. […] a big chunk of the original post was originally written by Marko Kloos, author and blogger. butchering a whole herd of holy cows. the munchkin wrangler. This piece, plus his essay "Why the Gun is Civilization" are often reposted on gun […]

  133. Jeff says:

    The HK- 91/G-3 plain works, as does most of soviet designs. I would also beg to differ that the fans of the M-14 have never had to hump it around. I have known many combat veterns who have had their lives depend on the M-14 and love/respect that rifle. The M-16 platform is plain junk, no way around it.

  134. […] "review" is originally from here: The Munchkin Wrangler: butchering a whole herd of holy cows. I can highly recommend the blog, the author is a really bright young man. __________________ […]

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