and that’s why you shouldn’t name your kids after genocidal dictators.

Update on this post:

The three children of the Campbell couple, JoyceLynn Aryan Nation Campbell, Honszlynn Hinler Jeannie Campbell and Adolf Hitler Campbell, are now wards of the State of New Jersey. 

The parents were looking for attention, and it looks like they got it.  I’m not at all in favor of the government taking children away from their parents except in the most extreme circumstances, but the NJ Division of Youth and Family Services seems to think that the circumstances are extreme enough in this case.  (They say that they wouldn’t remove children from a home just for the names alone, so something else must be going on with the Campbell family.)

Regardless of how you or I feel about the naming issue, or the state taking custody of someone’s kids, I’m sure most of us can agree that it’s a damn shame that a.) those kids were born to mental duds, and b.) those kids are caught in the middle of this idiocy.

I swear, you need to pass a state and Federal background check to own a .22, but anyone can procreate without any proof of competence or education…


13 thoughts on “and that’s why you shouldn’t name your kids after genocidal dictators.

  1. Shootin' Buddy says:

    Behold! The power of Libertarianism–the a la carte of philosophy.

    Inconsistent whining about government? Check.
    Deus ex machina? NJCPS, check.
    Wanting something for nothing? Of course, check.
    Wookie suit/nut jobs? Double check.

    Shootin’ Buddy

  2. dot says:

    We should register all sexual paraphernalia and organs. We should also register the organ players just like we do the donors. A database of bits, truly. No bytes on the bits, though, because it is so unhygienic! Once everyone is in the database, we license the output and raise the fees dependent on population density. In no time at all, cookies will once again be at Neiman-Marcus prices! Pork, it’s not just for politicians anymore!!

  3. JIGSAW says:

    i loved the bit in the article i read on the topic (,27574,24916019-401,00.html) where the father said that he didn’t “expect that the names would cause problems when the children started school” – moron!

    I have often thought that a licence to procreate wouldn’t be the worse thing – however this contravenes my “govt should get out and stay out of my life” philosophy!

  4. crankylitprof says:

    The sad part is, there are plenty of people who would read Dot’s comment and take it dead-seriously, rather than sarcasm.

    While this couple are a pair of assclowns, the NJCPS better have proof of more up their collective sleeve, otherwise they’ve completely shit the bed.

    I suppose it would get more attention if CPS’ all over the country decided the name “Morgan” referenced the pirate or the rum, called it abusive and started snatching kids for that. Yuppies everywhere would instruct their yard boys to get out the pitchforks and riot on their behalf.

  5. Tam says:

    While this couple are a pair of assclowns, the NJCPS better have proof of more up their collective sleeve, otherwise they’ve completely shit the bed.


    Assclownery is not illegal in America, because then we have to decide what exactly constitutes “assclownery”. And don’t you libertarian gun nuts want the majority to have the pull on that lever? 😐

  6. Gerry N. says:

    I hope those idiots get hurt. Badly. Because stupidity should hurt.

  7. staghounds says:

    Dot, I understand your concern about sexual paraphernalia, but why organs, or the players thereof?

    There’s nothing in the reports I read that implicates any musical instrument in this whole sorry tale.

  8. ChrisB says:

    “They say that they wouldn’t remove children from a home just for the names alone, so something else must be going on with the Campbell family”

    Well, that settles it, a govt. bureaucrat says something so it must be true! I mean, it’s not like we’ve ever seen an instance where a govt. agency abused it’s authority or even just acted completely outside the law.

    Let’s see what Sgt. John Harris of the Holland Township Police Department said about the Campbell family.

    “I’ve dealt with the family for years and as far as the children are concerned, I have never had any reports of any abuse with the children,” Harris said. “As far as I know, he’s always been very good with the children.”

  9. Marko says:

    If there’s nothing beyond the media attention, then I hope the NJCPS gets their asses handed to them in court. You know I’m not exactly the raging statist type.

  10. ChrisB says:

    I know that, but I think a reasonable person should withhold judgment until more information becomes available.

    Actions like the seizing of those children can occur simply because a statist judge woke up on the wrong side of the bed that day, and unfortunately judges have immunity so long as they’re acting within the capacity of a judge, even if they’re breaking the law.

  11. mtsonline says:

    They just want to regulate which genocidal dictator you name your kids after. I’m sure if you choose Mao, or Fidel, or Stalin, your chances of child removal would be far less. Heck, you might get a blue ribbon in some places like Berkeley. Even though the first and last killed more people than the Hitler dude. Fidel was only limited by his having a lightly populated country, not his desires. And if you refuse to put a hammer & sickle on a cake, you’re the intolerant one.

    As far as abusing kids with silly names, I see people with kids whose names are the likes of LaDasha (la-a), Ikea, laQueefa, etc. Hollywood types get away with that silliness because their kids will never have to work. These kids will have to, and most likely will need to use a resume.

    Guess what? If you’re a boy named Sue, when you turn 18 you can have it legally changed to Jake! Then sue your parents yourself in civil court for pain and suffering. Forget the state.

  12. Kristopher says:

    So … how many children in this country have been seized because they were named Che’ ?

    Or how about that common Arabic first name, Osama?

    If the State of NJ does not have some compelling evidence, the officials involved need to hang from lamp-posts.

    A better solution would be for a judge to offer the kids manumission, a name change, and a chance to divorce their parents once they hit 12 or so … at THEIR option, not the judge’s.

    This is just crap.

  13. Justthisguy says:

    Hinler? Hinler? I betcha that yahoo was trying to spell “Himmler”, and failed. Yup, lotsa fail there.

    Dammit, I try to set a good example for my fellow blue-eyed slightly-crazy-but-brilliant prone-to-violence folks from Northern Yurrop!

    And then we get absolute doodahs like this, who can’t even spell!

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