monday search term safari LXII.

f88 austeyr rifle-ebay

Contrary to what Sarah Brady and the VPC are telling folks, you can’t get guns off eBay, especially not fully automatic ones like the Austeyr (which is the current service rifle of the Australian military.)  Hell, the gun-fearing weenies at eBay get their panties in a wad over magazines.  I’m surprised they still allow the sale of holsters, actually, but I guess they haven’t been able to come up with a good rationalization why a piece of leather sewn into holster shape is more dangerous than one sewn into a purse shape…especially since both of them can hold a handgun.

make selective fire cz 75

Ooh, that’s a big no-no.  Turning (or even trying to turn) an off-the-shelf semi-auto pistol into a machine pistol will get you the attention of the BATFEIEIO, and ten years or so in Club Fed. 

If you have the proper license to manufacture a legal machine gun, you wouldn’t be searching the Intertubes on how to do it, so I strongly advise you to leave that Cee-Zed in its factory-original configuration, which is one bang per trigger pull.  (Take it from someone who’s had the opportunity to legally shoot a select-fire Glock 18—machine pistols are pretty pointless, and merely a fun way to waste a lot of ammo.)

best simple writer laptop

As a writer, you’re in the lucky position to not need a lot of processing power.  Word processors can run on incredibly modest hardware.  Your main shopping criteria should be a good keyboard, long battery life, and decent portability.  (If you only write at home, you can scratch the last item.)  I like MacBooks and iBooks because they can run Scrivener, and the Alphasmart Neo because it runs for a year on a set of AA batteries.  (If someone ever made a Neo that runs Scrivener, it would be the Best Writing Thingy Evar, and I’d buy ten.)

what does lobster shells do to a dogs stomach

Let’s think about this for a second.  You have hard lobster shells that have lots of shaprp edges from getting cracked, in addition to all the natural defensive spikes and ridges on a lobster’s armor.  What do you think all these sharp edges and spikes will do as they course through a dog’s soft and squishy digestive tract?

(Pro tip: When Rover eats lobster shells, and then starts bleeding from his southbound orifice. get him to a vet, instead of getting on the Internets to find out what to do next.)

why do liberals hate libertarians

Because libertarians are heartless, selfish people who would let the poor die in the streets.  (Conservatives hate them because they’re irresponsible chowderheads who would let people buy pot and cocaine at Walgreens on the way to the abortion clinic.)

In general, both liberals and conservatives like the part of libertarian ethos that goes “Nobody gets to tell you what to do…”, but they hate the part that goes, “…but you don’t get to tell anyone else what to do, either.”

fatherhood, the toughest job you’ll ever have

I don’t know about fatherhood per se.  Siring offspring is actually somewhat easy, and there are tons of male progenitors whose involvement in their childrens’ lives is limited to sending child support checks and the occasional birthday cards.

Parenting, however, is a tough job, without a question.  As I’ve mentioned before, being a stay-at-home Dad to two kids is the toughest job I’ve had, even more demanding than military service.  The mental demands of being on the job 24/7 without time off combine with the cyclical and never-ending nature of your tasks to grind you down a little every day.  It’s fun, it’s rewarding, and it damn sure is more important than any other job you’ve ever had, but it isn’t easy.

conservation of mass and werewolves

Werewolf fiction that respects the law of conservation of mass works around the rule that the mass in a closed system remains constant.  For werewolves, that would mean that a 120-pound person would be a 120-pound wolf—no transforming into some hulking 600-pound monster.  Werecritter stories that respect the law of conservation instead of just waving the “It’s Magic!” wand tend to center around critters that are roughly similar in mass to adult humans: wolves, jaguars, leopards, cougars/mountain lions, and so on.  No werebears or weretigers, since a 600-pound weretiger or 1,200-pound weregrizzly would be incredibly obese in human form.

munchkin wrangler moleskine

I like the concept of the Moleskine, but not the execution.  The paper in the Moles doesn’t take fountain pen ink too well, and they’re overpriced for what you get.

My favorites these days are Piccadillys, which are Moleskine clones.  They’re half the price of the Moles, and have better paper quality for fountain pen use.  Borders carries the Piccadillys for $4, $5, and $6 respectively for the small, medium, and large sizes.  Toss in one of the usual 30% off coupons, and the large Pics are under five bucks, which beats the pants off paying $15 for a Moleskine.

chihuahua is biting our family

If the little rat is biting the family, you have a behavioral problem, because it doesn’t respect or understand the pack hierarchy in your family (in which the dog ranks at the bottom.)  You need to fix that, because a dog showing aggression to his masters is not acceptable.  Seek professional help from a dog trainer, if you don’t know how to handle the issue.

songs about becoming a parent

If they’re written by people who aren’t yet parents, they’re usually centered around open arms, the miracle of life, the joy of impending parenthood, and so on.

If they’re written by people who are already parents, they’re usually centered around alcohol.

lamy 2000

That’s Lamy’s flagship fountain pen.  (The pen in my current header image is a Lamy 2000, with an extra-fine nib.)  If you’re looking for a new high-quality fountain pen to last you for decades, and you don’t want to take out a bank loan for a writing implement, then the Lamy 2000 is your best bet.

"to each according to their need"

The second half of that maxim goes, “…from each according to their ability.”  It gets college Marxists all excitedly nodding their heads and pumping their fists in agreement.  That’s because college Marxists haven’t had enough life experience yet to know that such a system greatly encourages need, and greatly discourages ability.  Sooner or later, you need a government apparatchik to decide on your exact levels of need and ability, and they’re never in agreement with your own assessment.

And that’s your Monday morning distraction from the soul-crushing drudgery that is the start of the week!  Tune in again next week for another edition!


17 thoughts on “monday search term safari LXII.

  1. “to each according to their need”

    The single best explanation can be found in Ayn Rands “Atlas shrugged”, part two chapter ten: the sign of the dollar, the tramps speech about the events at 20th century motors after its new management adopted “to each according to his need, from each according to his ability” as their new motto.

  2. MarkHB says:

    “In general, both liberals and conservatives like the part of libertarian ethos that goes “Nobody gets to tell you what to do…”, but they hate the part that goes, “…but you don’t get to tell anyone else what to do, either.””

    Mmmph. Ain’t that the truth.

  3. Sennin says:

    “conservation of mass and werewolves”

    Where does the energy necessary for the conversion come from? If it comes from the creature itself, shouldn’t its mass be reduced proportionately?

    This would indicate that werewolves eventually reduce to elves/yipper-dogs, depending on their current physical state.

    Inquiring minds want to know …

    • T.Stahl says:

      But with e=mc² there’s a whole lot of energy in even a tiny amount of mass.

      • Sennin says:

        Yes, but even in a highly efficient biological organism, most of that is lost to entropy – Second Law rules.

      • Windy Wilson says:

        Yes, but we’re still talking magic here. A little bending of the entropy rule is nothing when it comes to bending the other rules about shape-shifting. As an aside, when you consider how big some people are getting, it might be an interesting Were-fiction trope to have a 400 lb morbidly obese person transform into a 400 lb were bear or some such creature.
        Not that that story would be any easier to read than the usual were-fiction.

      • Kristopher says:

        Poul Anderson did it with his Operation Chaos series.

        One of the bad guys was a were-tiger … and was a large obese person in human form.

      • perlhaqr says:

        And Larry Niven had a were-whale that was a huge dude in human form… although that was in the stories that explicitly utilised magic, as well.

        At 6’5″ and 250#, I’d be a really good start to a pretty bad-ass werewolf. 😀

      • LabRat says:

        Kristopher- thank you so damn much, I could not for the life of me remember either the title or the author of that story, just how cool it was.

  4. Roger says:

    Actually I had some mag pouches pulled from eBay. I had advertised them as being for an FN/FAL. They said they didn’t allow “assault weapon” parts or accessories. My argument that the were not any part of the gun but merely pieces of sewn nylon with belt loops did not convince them. I concluded that there is no arguing with a zealot – especially if the zealot is a large company.

    • Kristopher says:

      Ebay is useless for selling stuff, but great for buying. The buyer can refund on any mere whim, and the seller is screwed.

      If you want to sell, use craigslist.

  5. […] like me (but in no wise in an imitation of me), does a Monday-morning weird-search roundup, and he had this seriously choice (bordering on prime) item this week: conservation of mass and werewolves Werewolf fiction that respects the law of conservation of mass […]

  6. “…both liberals and conservatives like the part of libertarian ethos that goes “Nobody gets to tell you what to do…”

    hard to argue with that. but here’s where the twain doth diverge:

    “to each according to their need…from each according to their ability.”

    far from exclusive marxist dogma, liberals embrace that particular ideal, which is all about telling you what to do. and:

    “Sooner or later, you need a government apparatchik to decide…”

    that, by definition, is the difference between “liberal” and “conservative”.


    btw, for those that haven’t seen it, we gots munchkin wrangler merch.!

    you get yours today! (sorry, didn’t mean that to sound all marxist and shit…)

  7. MarkHB says:

    Pawnbroker, the Conservative will still get around to telling you what to do, and not be too great a slouch over it.

    Frankly, I’m feeling a goodly dose of “A Plague O’Both Your Houses” these days, with no viable alternative in sight – even the official Libertarian Party has an xTian mandate, which as an atheist agnostic I find unacceptable.

    I think I’m reaching the end of a hard road which ends at the Town of HB, Population 1. It really shouldn’t have been such a surprise for me, but I got all excited and my hopes up and stuff. Oh, well.

  8. “I got all excited and my hopes up and stuff. Oh, well.”

    i think about 52% of the electorate share that disillusionment right about now, mhb…not that the 48% would have us any better off if they’d had their way. and you’re right that the party of the big l’s hasn’t a clue as to the leanings and desires of all the little l’s out here.

    but: “I think I’m reaching the end of a hard road which ends at the Town of HB, Population 1.”

    sounds lonely there, h-b…and not likely doable in any case. hang in there; difficult times have brought out the best in us before (think 1941 and 1980), and ya gotta believe it can happen again.


  9. MarkHB says:

    Just trying to do what I can to get my wants and needs from life without stiffing anyone, jtc. I don’t bend my knee, nor do I take favours without trying to pay for ’em. My political party may only comprise myself, but if people are willing to say “hey, this guy’s company is tolerable” then everything else can come under “And he’s not selling me anything”.

    That’s about it, really.

  10. Brilliant and good reading for grocery checkout

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