monday search term safari LXXVI.

roman polanski current legal status

His current legal status is “Child-raping shitbag, breathing bar-filtered air in Switzerland.” 

writing straight on unlined paper

Some people can write straight on unlined paper, others can’t keep a straight line to save their lives.  If you’re in the latter group, you can print out guide sheets that you can put underneath the blank page.

germany seax knife

The Seax was a single-edged large knife used by the Saxons.  They were so identified with it that the name of the knife became the basis for the name of the tribe. 

"if it only saves one" fallacy

The problem with the “If it only saves one life” argument for passing laws is that it can be easily turned on itself by finding instances in which the implementation of the law would cost a life or three as well.  For example, banning guns may save lives by making it harder for really dumb criminals to get one, but it may also cost lives by removing the ability of the law-abiding folk to defend themselves against the smarter criminals.  When you point that out, however, those possible deaths are written off as acceptable collateral damage.

german movie critics

I should totally do movie reviews in a thick German accent, and filter American flicks through imagined German artsy sensibilities.  It would be a cross between Roger Ebert, and Mike Myers’ Dieter from Saturday Night Live.

is 14 a good number

It’s a perfectly cromulent number.  It’s also a very useful number with considerable utility.  Without it, some states wouldn’t have an Age of Consent.

mouse infestation hazardous for toddler?

Well, the mice won’t gang up on Little Timmy to bring him down in the middle of the playroom like a swarm of furry white land speeders felling a binky-sucking AT/AT, but mice have other ways of being a hazard to kids with uncalibrated immune systems.  Mouse poop isn’t among the healthiest substances on the planet, and toddlers like to stick stuff into their mouths. 

novelists composing by paper or on computer

Some novelists write by hand, some use the computer, some swear by their typewriters.  If I had to wager a guess, I’d say that 80% use the computer these days, with the rest split between longhand and typewriters.  (A surprisingly high percentage of my favorite authors either write by hand, or with a typewriter.)

how the fuck do you disasemble the colt

Heh.  This one just kicked over my giggle box this morning.  From the level of frustration crammed into that search term, I’m going to guess he’s a 1911 noob trying to disassemble one.

porn discovered on company laptop

I was a corporate IT drone once upon a time.  When we discovered porn on peoples’ laptops, their reaction would invariably be either a.) head-hanging shame, or b.) steadfast refusal to admit responsibility.  Popular excuse: “It was TeH hAxXoRz!”


That’s the MSTS for today.  I am pleased at the relative lack of disturbing/disgusting search terms this week.  See what happens when you apply yourselves, Internets?


31 thoughts on “monday search term safari LXXVI.

  1. pdb says:

    how the fuck do you disasemble the colt

    That guy is in for a ball when he tries to put it back together. My first time trying to get the recoil spring plug under the bushing, I slipped and the plug shot off and nailed an innocent coffee cup. I’ve also witnessed another guy sproing himself in the chin with the plug.

    • perlhaqr says:

      I took out my 24″ flatscreen monitor with the guide rod cap. Much swearing shortly followed.

    • I used to live in a high-rise; I’d clean guns out on the balcony (since Hoppes #9 smells so nice).

      One fine day, the recoil spring plug got away from me and went arcing out over the parking lot.

    • DrStrangegun says:

      No flying guide rod caps here, I have thumbs of steel and dry hands.

      What I *have* done, however… once I got the barrel link somehow hung up in it’s channel and stuck fast on a new gun.

      The only other major incidents are getting popped with the hammer with the 1911(original)’s long hammer, and deeply slicing my thumb and finger open on the edges of a new stainless Colt’s slide. A perfectly straight 90 degree edge makes a perfectly good knife when you don’t blunt it….

  2. Blast Hardcheese says:

    “Now is the time on Munchkin Wrangler when we DANCE!”

    *spastic flailing of limbs*

    Also, a gang of mice can skeletonize a wildebeest in under five minutes.

  3. Tim Buckner says:

    I read an article on Jim Harrison recently that said he writes his work on paper at his home in Livingston,Montana and mails it to his secretary in Michigan.She types it to send to the publisher.

  4. AughtSix says:

    “…disassemble the colt”

    Maybe he’s got a young horse in need of some internal maintenance.

  5. Weer'd Beard says:

    pdb, My S&W1911 came with a FLGR and the plug was fairly sharp. One day that bastard went flying and took a chunk of my thumb with it.

    Also my 1911 has the idiot scratch!

    • Jay G. says:

      I’ve got three 1911s (well, two 1911s and a 1991A1) and all three have the idiot scratch. As did the AO1911 I traded for the VEPR…

    • Laughingdog says:

      I’m pretty sure that there has to be a FLGR involved in order for anyone to get too frustrated with a 1911. Make it a two-piece, and it’s nightmarish.

      It was my first 1911, and it was parkerized with cocobolo wood grips. It was pretty, and I was weak.

      I am curious about what this idiot scratch is though.

    • ATLien says:

      if that’s the scratch on the frame from trying to get the take down switch back home, then i have it, too. I ALWAYS foret about the little notch. Every. Single. Time.

      • Laughingdog says:

        I guess that’s the advantage of being a mechanical engineer then. No idiot scratch on mine. I’m very particular about the finish on that gun, so the potential to scratch it jumped right out at me when I was putting it back together the first time. The only marks I will allow on that gun are wear marks from the holster.

  6. Phil says:

    I’ve never felt the 1911 to be difficult at all to strip and reassemble. There’s more steps than more modern designs, but it is well within the realm of possibility for anybody even slightly mechanically inclined.

    And if you have sharp edges on the recoil spring plug for the FLGR, remember- humans are tool users. Use something to depress the plug so it doesn’t bite into your thumb.

    I’ve yet to inflict an idiot scratch on my 1911s. But then, I’ve never once had a problem with the front pivot pin detent on an AR-15 lower either, and that’s well known to be a cast iron pain in the rear to many.

  7. I think the standard reaction to porn on a company computer these days is a variation on “Jetson, You’re Fired!!”

    If it is kiddie porn, then it usually starts with “you are under arrest. You have the right to remain silent.”

  8. jesse says:

    I, for one, would love to see Marko do the whole “german movie critic” thing. At the least, it would be funny, at best, AWESOME!

  9. Dwight Brown says:

    The first time I took my Kimber (the first handgun I ever purchased) apart, I bounced the recoil spring plug off of my glasses. Hard. Hard enough that I would have needed an eyepatch if I hadn’t been wearing them.

    This proves two things:
    1) I am not terribly bright.
    2) Wearing eye protection is a good idea; not just while shooting, but even while working on your guns.

    • Will says:

      Local gun dealer wears an eye patch due to this launching system.
      Also have a friend who has been looking for a Black-T coated plug in his garage, for a few years now.

  10. guy says:

    He might be asking about some of Colt’s earlier designs. My FFL guy had an early .380(and for the life of me I can’t remember the model number) that I actually had to look up the field strip instructions on the internet for him.

    I thought the 1911 was pretty self-explanatory, but this one kicked my butt.

  11. Matthew Carberry says:

    In the spirit of the season…

    a Mouse infestation can be pretty dangerous for dreaming tweens and their brave dolls as well.

  12. Don Meaker says:

    Homey: I got a 1911 for my wife
    Me: Good trade…

  13. ajdshootist says:

    The place not to take a 1911 apart is in the back seat of a Jag doing about 110mph down a motorway when the plug powered by a compressed spring flies out clips the driver’s ear and hits the front windscreen followed rapidly by the said Jag slowing down and the driver telling the others in the car to chuck the blank blank little blank out the door!

  14. Gerry N. says:

    In a saner time, decent stationery came packaged with a lined sheet to place under one’s writing paper so lines would be in civilized order. Fortunately, my wee brain is wired for nice, straight lines and my longhand looks as if it were laid out by a machine. Margines and paragraph indents, too.

    This fortunate pass stood me well in hah skrool ingilish. I could, and did, write the most unintelligible tripe and sweet old Mrs. Jonasson would give me “B’s” anyway because it looked so nice. That and I was a polite Norwegian boy who said “Yes, ma’am, No, Ma’am, Please and Thank you” while I was busily unscrewing the knobs on her desk drawers. Eddy Haskell was a rank amateur.

    Mice? Mice are just cute, furry cockroaches.

    Gerry N.

  15. Mark says:

    Field stripping a USGI 1911 is hard? Hell, I detail strip mine about every 6 months, just to keep in practice.
    This is with my Para-Ordnance P-14, though. I don’t puck with the Schwartz safety on my Kimber. Learned that one the hard way. That system isn’t pleasant getting back together…

  16. T.Stahl says:

    As an engineer I should be smart enough to disassemble a 1911…

    …or clever enough to get a Glock. 😉

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