Delivered fresh from Castle Frostbite in scenic Cryogenica via satellite link, using only the best bits and bytes, it’s the Monday Search Term Safari, the only thing that keeps you from blowing your brains all over your cubicle this morning! (Well, that and coffee.)
advantages of neo laptops
Light weight (less than 2 pounds), ridiculously sturdy, and really long battery life. Added bonus: no Intertubular distractions. It’s a paperless typewriter.
porn too much free content
Yes, that’s definitely the problem with the Intertubes today: too much free porn. A fella can get all confused and side-tracked. There ought to be a law, or something.
why politicians hate libertarians
Because a libertarian system of government has very few attachment points for universal power-grab adapters. All the mainstream politicos hate libertarians for the same reason candlemakers hated Edison. If the Libertarians got their way, 95% of Capitol Hill would have to go out and get real jobs instead of sucking on the public teat.
how to write straight on unlined paper
You can either use lined guide sheets underneath the unlined paper, or practice a lot. I’ve also heard of people making faint lines on the paper with a pencil, and then erasing the pencil lines from the finished page, but that just sounds like way too much effort to me.
convert airsoft to fire real bullets
Uh, no. Your airsoft gun is made mostly of plastic and diecast zinc alloy, two materials that are ill-suited for containing the pressures involved. Also, what you have there is a gun-shaped toy. Just because it has the shape of a gun, and mimics its function somewhat, doesn’t mean you can just “convert” it into a real gun. (Generally speaking, the best way to convert an airsoft gun into a real one is to sell it on eBay, and then use the money toward a Ruger 10/22 at WalMart.)
tf2 imac 9400
TF2 should play just fine on your iMac. The GeForce 9400 is an integrated graphics chip, but it’s the best one out there at the moment. I can actually play Call of Duty 4 on my ION box, which has the same GPU mated to an Atom processor. Your iMac has a Core 2 Duo CPU, which runs circles around the Atom, and TF2 is less demanding than CoD4.
not feeling up to being a parent
Nobody ever truly feels up to that job, honestly. But if you have honest concerns about your ability to handle the task, either emotionally or financially, you should probably hold off on having kids. It will change your life completely, that’s for sure. I wouldn’t give it up for anything, and the rewards are many, but I know from experience that I wouldn’t have had the emotional stability and maturity to handle being a parent when I was in my Twenties.
what does a raccoon on a roof sound like
As a general rule, animals running around on a roof always sound at least three times as big as they actually are. A squirrel or chipmunk sounds like an excited cocker spaniel. A raccoon sounds like Ripley playing Dance Dance Revolution with a power loader, especially at 3AM in the morning.
how to make a self jacking off machine
You want to engineer a device to perform a function for which you already have a perfectly suited tool on the end of your arm? You must be German.
Finally, another Vespa search string! (I am confused, though: are you looking for a scooter with boobies, a scooter shaped like boobies, or boobies shaped like a scooter?)
libertarian kids stories
You can find a few here.
sticky toffee pudding—-steamed
That’s a delicious dessert. Robin makes those by steaming the toffee pudding in little ramekins. One bite, and you’ll float up to the ceiling like the cartoon dog after he took a bite of his biscuit.
pelikan m205 weight
You’re in luck. I just happen to have a digital pocket scale in my desk drawer, and a Pelikan M205 in front of me. It weighs exactly 14.59 grams, or 0.514 ounces, or 225 grains, or 72.95 carats. (Pick your favorite unit of weight measure.)
And that’s the take for today. Don’t forget to feed some more search terms into the Snarkolator, and remember to tip your waitstaff!