monday search term safari LXXXVII.

chinese pheasant

Those are pretty birds.  We had one wandering around the house for a few days last spring.  Here’s a picture I took.  Remarkable bird, id’nit, squire? Lovely plumage!

Pheasant 009

haggis porn

You, dear sir/ma’am, win this week’s prize for Strangest Fetish.  Haggis porn?  Honestly.  That’s a waste of perfectly good food.

german military jacket will people think

Will people think you’re a German soldier or veteran if you run around with a German uniform jacket?  Not likely.  If I saw someone just wearing one of our old uniform jackets, I’d assume the wearer either got it as a souvenir, or bought it because they thought it looked cool.  Now if you put on the entire uniform, rank devices and all, it would be a different story.

german maroon beret

In the Bundeswehr, the maroon beret is worn by the airborne/airmobile branches: Fallschirmjaeger (paratroops), Fernspaeher (long range reconnaissance patrol), Kommando Spezialkraefte (special forces), and Heeresflieger (army aviation).  Each branch will have their own beret badge—the Fallis wear a diving eagle, the Heeresflieger wear a winged sword, and so on.

neo keyboard itouch

You can’t use a Neo as a keyboard for the iPod touch.  In fact, you can’t use any sort of external keyboard for the iPod touch, even though the current generation has Bluetooth built in, and works fine with other Bluetooth devices.  I guess Apple was worried that external text input capability would cannibalize low-end MacBook sales.  The upcoming iPad, however, does feature the ability to use an external BT keyboard.

tomcat "cocked and locked" safe?

The safety on the Beretta Tomcat is a stiff and fumbly little lever, and I’m not 100% sure it actually blocks the sear.  I carried my Tomcat uncocked and with the safety off—it does have a double-action trigger, after all.  When I carried a Jetfire, which has a single-action trigger, I carried it hammer down on a loaded chamber.

write a sentence using the word crazy

It’s crazy that you can’t write a sentence using the word “crazy” without resorting to Google-Fu.  You probably have a long and sedentary career in public service ahead of you.

how to write a military novel

Like I’ve said before: write whatever kind of novel you want, and then go through it and insert a rank in front of every name.  Presto! Instant military novel.

what the fuck is wrong with wordpress

Nothing at all, really.  I’ve been on WordPress for right around two years now, and it has been totally reliable.  Blogger, on the other hand, made me want to pull my hair out on a weekly basis.  WordPress even let me import my entire Blogspot blog, complete with comments, and everything came over without a bobble.

come from ass

The answer to your query is “a baby donkey”.

454 casull belt buckle

The .454 Casull is a zesty round.  Any belt buckle capable of holding a gun chambered in that caliber would have to be hefty in size—probably about the size of a hubcap.  Also, if you carry your .454 in a belt buckle holster, make sure you get a sturdy belt.


There’s your free ice cream for the day, friends and neighbors.  May it ease the pain of this %&$#  DST transition.  But remember: we must all put up with this nonsense to save coal until the Hun is defeated in Europe.


25 thoughts on “monday search term safari LXXXVII.

  1. pdb says:

    Personally, I think Scottish porn, with or without haggis, would be horrifying enough.

    “Och, ye got a wee bit skew on y’r treddle dontcha lass? Dontcha lass? Who’d y’r laird be now?”

  2. LabRat says:

    Foodies tend to use the phrase “food porn” a lot; I could easily imagine that extended to individual dishes with the same intent.

  3. og says:

    You used “Haggis” and “food” in the same sentence.


  4. Heath J says:

    Unrelated to Search Term Safari, but you REALLY REALLY need to go to this forum and participate in this thread….,8344.msg133488.html#msg133488

    Swords vs Guns, and plenty of dumb marks to go around.

  5. Avenger29 says:

    I actually like DST- driving home without the sun in my eyes is excellent. Having time to shoot or work on cars or grill out after work/school is also great. What I hate about it is the twice a year change. That’s retarded. I don’t feel right for about a week afterwards.

  6. Jake says:

    and so it was declared that high noon would arrive at one o’clock …

    I despise daylight saving time – I figure that the sun is the same (in a relative way) whether we call it nine o’clock, ten o’clock, eleventy-fifty o’clock, or fish o’clock.

    making me rearrange my frame of reference twice a year from one arbitrary measurement to another is cruel.

  7. Ritchie says:

    Working at a very small company south of Denver, I was told of a former receptionist who broke out it screams one day. One or two sturdy lads beat feet to the front desk, to find the lady in question terrified-by a pheasant, standing outside on the walkway. City folk.

  8. Will says:

    I carry my Jetfire the same way. ‘Course, being a left hander, I’m kinda forced to. Still have yours?

  9. anonymous says:

    From my comment at Tam’s, who is delighted to have sunset occur close to bedtime…

    Why can’t I just leave this alone? It’s not such a big deal…only it is, innit?

    Because the unnecessary, unwarranted, unnatural,
    -and unconstitutional- machinations of .gov are wrong. They are wrong when they take the fruit of your labor and hand it to those who grew none, they are wrong when they prop up banks and manufacturers that deserve to die, they are wrong when they dictate the price the doc charges to fix your ticker, they are wrong when they force you to wear a helmet so as not to splatter *your* brains on I-75, they are wrong when they would remove the means from your hands to protect yourself from robbers, rapists, zombies, or .gov itself…

    And they are wrong when they purport to “save” daylight so that you can read your book or ride your bike ’til 9 f’n p.m. I know it, you know it, everybody here that is loathe to whisper that the Empress Is Nekkid knows it…they’re just wrong.

    And this time my dear erudite, articulate, intelligent, prolific fount of knowledge, reason, history, and humor, this time, so are you.

    Al Terego

    • Joanna says:

      Wow … you picked quite a hill to die on.

    • perlhaqr says:

      Time is a fiction anyway.

      Hell, I’d even go so far as to say it’s a religion, in that just like fiat currency, it only works because of belief. The passage of time is (I think, not being a particle physicist) mostly a constant. But the concept of “2 o’clock” has absolutely no external meaning besides that which people choose to agree to give it. There are billions of devices on the planet marking the passage of time, but it is only the coordination of those devices that gives the concept of “meet me at three” any meaning at all.

      It is, in short, a giant mass consensual hallucination.

      Now, that said, it’s still dumb to go mucking about with the scale, precisely because of the fact that it’s only in coordination that it means anything. But this is hardly as fundamental an issue as wealth transfers or victim disarmament.

      • anonymous says:

        “…hardly as fundamental an issue as wealth transfers or victim disarmament.”

        Really? I thought that too; in fact my first comment at Tam’s was along the lines of since we’re dicking with the clock anyway, let’s crank it back a couple decades and do us all some real good.

        And like I said, I tried to leave it alone, but it wouldn’t leave me alone. “…it’s not such a big deal…only it is, innit?”

        Fundamental is incremental, perl…and as Tam herself so eloquently observed, “government by sedimentation” is miring us, suffocating us, slowly, inexorably, one almost indiscernible layer at a time.

        And that, finally, is all I’ve got to say about that…’cause it’s nearly ten o’clock, the sun’s almost set, and it’ll soon be time for beddiebye.


  10. Antibubba says:

    Haggis porn? While pointing in the same general direction, the stomach isn’t supposed to be the sexy part of the sheep.

  11. SgtStu says:

    Bloody p(h)easants! At least this one’s not being repressed or kippin’ on ‘is back… My wife had grilled pheasant on the way to work awhile back…new grille for Baby Jimmy was $190. At least it didn’t get the radiator or worse, the windshield. Around here (north central ND), they’re clustered by the roadside like feathered, flying deer; and now we’ve got moose to miss, as well.

  12. Joat says:

    I wore an old German military coat for a few years. The reason, It was cheep and it had a lot of pockets, you’ve got to love a coat that a 6 pack or a 24″ bolt cutter can disappear into.

  13. Stan says:

    I had one guy ask me if I was in the German army while wearing my surplus German Army jacket. Then again I am rather Aryan looking with the blond hair and blue eyes, but still…

  14. […] found Marko’s blog using the search term “haggis porn.”  Gun nuts being… well, slightly off-kilter, […]

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