a scientific poll of the utmost relevance.

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For this poll, it’s between the two “classic” martinis.  There are drinks that are called “martinis” which do not include only dry vermouth and gin or vodka, but we serious ethanol enthusiasts do not speak of them.  (Cocktail haters and “apple martini” heretics, hold your tongues.)

12 thoughts on “a scientific poll of the utmost relevance.

  1. JohnW says:

    The latter, but stirred, *not* shaken! Bruises the booze, doncha know…

  2. Jeff says:

    I never understood what ‘bruising the gin’ was supposed to mean. The reason I stir martinis is it leaves the finished drink crystal clear, rather than cloudy with air bubbles and ice chips.

    Gin is the only right answer. Also, use enough vermouth that you can taste it. Otherwise it’s just a glass of cold gin.

    • Weer'd Beard says:

      Agree 100%! Shaking clouds your gin, waters it down, and fills your glass with little ice chips.

      NOT good. I prefer to do as little agitation to the shaker. A quick flick of the wrist, then a pour through the strainer into the glass at the maximum height without splashing.

  3. Matthew Carberry says:

    “I would like to observe the vermouth from across the room while I drink my martini.“ – Winston Churchill

  4. Andrew Sarcus says:

    I suspect Churchill was avoiding the vermooth because of its lower proof.

    I take them shaken with good gin and enough vermoth to taste.

  5. Kendrick says:

    I have it on good authority that God himself mixed the first gin martini. Vodka martinis on the other hand are the province of heathens, communists, and Cthulhu worshiping cultists who hope to destroy the world – and no wonder they want it to end, they’re drinking vodka martinis!

    And Jeff, I believe that you’re right; “bruising” refers to the change in texture caused by air bubbles. Aside from that, shaking will cause more ice to melt than is absolutely necessary and hence water the martini down.

  6. Ah, the “proper martini” post. This works as well as, if not better than, the “Glock vs. 1911” post.

    That being said, a proper martini is made with gin. There are numerous delectable cocktails made with vodka, but not one of them is actually a martini.

    A proper martini is top-shelf gin, a few drops of dry vermouth, shaken with ice, served in a martini glass, with a green olive garnish.

  7. Peter says:

    Mr. Morris is correct. I don’t know what that abomination made from potato mash IS, but a Martini it is NOT.

  8. Lissa says:

    Gin tastes like nail polish remover that licked a pine tree.

  9. Ian Argent says:

    “Hearts full of youth, Hearts full of truth / Six parts gin to one part vermouth” covers my knowledge of the gin martini, except that my father observed once that he preferred to just wave the vermouth cork gently at his.

  10. Matthew Carberry says:

    I believe Churchill also once said one should simply uncap the Vermouth and incline it slightly in the direction of France as a salute before putting it away.

    My college roommate like to open the Vermouth bottle and “scare” the gin (making grr sounds no less) but not actually add it.

    I just rinse the ice with it then dump it out.

    • Ancient Woodsman says:

      All you nimrods who won’t shake a drink because of the evil ice chips and cloudiness have no a) patience, or b) class. Make your potion in a shaker, do the shooka-shooka dance, set the shaker aside until you have prepared the glass to receive the beverage, and pour gently through a strainer over your fresh garnish. Crystal clear, no chips. And if you’ve got four generations in the house, a little water from the ice is o.k.

      And yes, it is a GIN martini.

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