the rat will turn you upside down and shake out all your money.

News from Orlando: Admittance to the Rat Kingdom will now be an arm, a leg, two years of indentured servitude, and half your first-born.

Holy cow, I did not realize how much it actually costs to go see Mickey for a weekend.  A family of four needs to come up with some serious scratch once you consider airfare, rental, meals, admission, souvenirs, snacks…

Financially, it would be much easier on our family treasury to see the family in Germany for three weeks than to go get mugged by Mickey and Goofy for a long weekend.  Hell, for that kind of cash, I could have a fun weekend in the Big Apple, drinking expensive hooch while snorting foot-long lines of primo Bolivian Marching Powder off a squad of high-dollar call girls.

15 thoughts on “the rat will turn you upside down and shake out all your money.

  1. George says:

    Holy shit. And I thought Paramount’s Carowinds and King’s Dominion were expensive a few years ago when the family dragged me around (I’m a pilot, and I don’t mind acro, but I HATE rollercoasters for some reason)

    Eh, not much of a loss for me. I never liked amusment parks that much… I would like to go see the Epcot park.

  2. Lissa says:

    Crap. Good thing there’s a discount for Florida residents . . .

  3. Jay G. says:

    You’re just now finding this out?

    • Marko Kloos says:

      Yeah, I’m behind the curve. Couldn’t even contemplate a family trip since kid #1 was born, and didn’t have much of a desire for Disneyworld before then.

      I only went to a Disney location once, and that was Disneyland in Anaheim, back in early 1990. I seem to recall that admission was $20-something.

  4. William the Coroner says:

    Why the Hell would anyone in their right mind go there? Yes, Europe would be preferable, and more educational too.

  5. Hell, for that kind of cash, I could have a fun weekend in the Big Apple, drinking expensive hooch while snorting foot-long lines of primo Bolivian Marching Powder off a squad of high-dollar call girls.

    It’d probably be more fun. 🙂

    No offense intended here, but I went to the Magic Kingdom once, two decades ago. It was a February in Orlando. I was standing on the sidewalk, watching the parade, when a Disney goon came up to me and ordered to to stand next to the curb “so other people could pass by on the sidewalk.”

    I looked up and down the sidewalk. I could have opened fire with a M-60 in either direction and not hit a soul. I asked the good “what other people”; he informed me that I could stand next to the curb or move along and if I chose neither, he’d escort me from the park.

    I concluded that the Magic Kingdom was a reasonable simulation of what the world would be like if the Nazis had won the war.

  6. RevolverRob says:

    I’ve never wanted to go to Disneyworld, despite every third person I know saying, “You HAVE TO GO DUDE!”. For the price of a ticket to fly to Orlando, get a hotel, and pay admission, I could buy a ticket to Amsterdam. For the price of food, souvenirs, and alcohol in Disney (I would need a damn lot of alcohol), I could spent a weekend in the Amsterdam Red Light district.

    I’m thinking I know which one I’d prefer. Absinthe, red light district, and Amsterdam bars…or Disneyworld? I don’t think the “Magic” Kingdom can be that Magic.

    -Rob

  7. Phil says:

    Keep in mind that the one day price isn’t what you pay the entire time. If you’re going for several days, for example, going from a five to a six day pass may only be something like four bucks a head.

    Disney World isn’t cheap, nobody is pretending it is. But Disney has the best run theme parks in the world. When you’re there, you have no problems- you tell them, they take care of it. The only trick is paying for it.

  8. abnormalist says:

    As usual, I will be the counter example. Disney for us was a fun family vacation. Their ticket prices are high, and you are often stuck to going as the kids “want to go SOOOOO BAD”. That said if you pay retail price your a fool. Get a package deal, really cheap mid November or January. Include hotel, food, park tickets, and often a rental car for about the same price of a family of four for week long tickets.

    Yes Europe is more fun for those above 14, and while I wish it were different the kids wouldn’t enjoy a tour of the Guinness brewery anywhere near as much as I would.

  9. dpatten says:

    Take your own advice and go to Europe. I LIVE near Disney and don’t like to go. 3 months ago I had to break down and take the kid because, well, he wanted to go and the wife-unit did too. If Momma ain’t happy, nobody ain’t happy.

    Even with the Florida resident discount it is too expensive. It’s too crowded, and quite frankly, beginning to show its age. Anytime between late April and mid October and it is brutally heat-stroke inducingly hot and crowded with morbidly obese European tourists in retch inducingly tight/revealing outfits.

    With God as my witness, I saw a 350 lb Englishwoman in a tube top and spandex bottoms beseeching her son to stop assaulting Mickey mouse. Imagine this in a Mancs accent; “Nigel! Stop kicking Mickey! Nigel!” Her husband was half her size. A skinny little balding ginger fella with a wife-beater. who just sat there with a look like he was wishing for death.

    Seriously. It’s not worth it.

  10. Sendarius says:

    When I took the family to Rat World – Anaheim, it cost so much that my bank in Australia stopped my credit card.

    I bought the California Special (Sea World, multi-day Rat World, Universal Studios combo) for four, and it was over $1000.

  11. […] for us, we’re both fans of Disney World and Florida gives residential discounts.  I expect the rat will shake us down […]

  12. og says:

    We took the daughter there when she was nine. We went in the off season, which was a: Cooler, b: cheaper, and c: offered special discounts. All told it was about a K and a half for a week, which included park-hopping passes for the three of us, lodging, and (some)meals. You can improve on this by getting a room with a fridge and making and bringing snacks. We packed lunches every day and they were better than anything we could get in the parks.

    As an adult, you see the commerce in every authorized statue of the Mouse. As a kid, the place is magical, beautiful, clean, and exciting. Maybe it’s not for everyone. I had a good time. It was worth my price of admission to watch the people, and they were something to behold.

    it’s dumb to take a kid less than 8, because they can’t ride the rides, Same goes for ten year olds if they’re short. It’s also silly to think you’re gonna get by without buying the kids stuff, but you don’t have to get carried away.

    I’m sure someday my daughter will look at her Dibney trip with a jaded eye, but for the moment, at 14, it’s still an exciting memory for her, and she still talks about it. And we’ve been to amusement parks and touristy places and museums and etc, all over north America.

    No, trust me, I have NOT been compensated for this by The Mouse.

  13. Ken says:

    I’m with Og (we went in March, when we went). Them Disney johnnies really know how to run a railroad. The increase in the “a la carte” (so to speak) admission price is probably calculated to drive sales of the packages.

    When it comes to IP law, of course, they are teh eeevul. The next time that rodent gets within spitting distance of the public domain, I expect Congress will extend copyright to the heat death of the universe. One doesn’t have to be totally anti-IP to see that the current system is a mess.

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