“groundhog day” goes international.

Happy Groundhog Day, imaginary Intertubes pals!

Those of you following me on Twitter will have seen these, but I figured I’d pull them into a single post for the non-Tweeting audience. It’s a quick list of what I think the various national remakes of Groundhog Day would look like.

  • In the German adaptation, a guy in a black turtleneck stands in a starkly-lit white room and yells “Murmeltier! Verboten!” at the camera for 89 minutes. Then he takes a dump on the coffee table.
  • In the French version, the main character Philippe spends the day chain-smoking Gauloises and discussing Camus with the groundhog. It rains throughout the entire movie.
  • The Swedish remake takes place entirely at night and chronicles the groundhog’s decline into insanity. ( NC-17 for violence, graphic sex.)
  • The Uwe Boll version features Burt Reynolds as a humanoid Punxsutawney Phil. Also, he’s a wizard. Then Jason Statham kills him. There are boobies, and something with tree elves on trapezes. (In 3D.)
  • In the Russian version, the groundhog’s village is burned down by the invading Nazis, and he spends the rest of the movie drinking vodka and singing depressing folk songs. Then his own countrymen kill and eat him. (Categorized under “Light-hearted Comedies”.)

Did I miss any good local or regional remake ideas? Japanese anime? Bollywood? Made-for-TV telenovela?


6 thoughts on ““groundhog day” goes international.

  1. Kaerius says:

    In the japanese anime version, the groundhog has supernatural ninja powers and has to fight off demons with a katana, and Phil keeps having nosebleeds whenever Rita displays any interest back in him.

  2. guy says:

    “In the French version…it rains throughout the entire movie”.

    Also all the main characters die in the end, including the groundhog.

  3. guy says:

    Actually Kaerius, now that I think about it, they already made the Japanese version – his testicles swell up enormously and he used them to crush his enemies.

  4. Michael G. says:

    How about a Felini version? An endlessly repeating melancholic late-summer day, with everybody eating and drinking wine in the shade of olive trees. Rita is the village bombshell all the boys are secretly lusting after, and Phil is the pet of a huge-breasted tobacco shop lady.

  5. In the Irish version, they feed praties to the rodent whilst they drink whiskey.
    Then everyone falls over.

  6. Gerry N. says:

    In the Norwegian version they all sit around a picnic table eating raspberry jam rolled in lefse generously spread with sugar and heavy cream. Phil eats far more than he can handle, rolls down the hill into the fjord where he’s eaten by herrings. Everyone (except Phil) returns to the house for coffee with the Pastor. They all try to determine what Christ would have done. The coffee is dripped and served with lumps of sugar.

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