With the WordPress switch to a different stats page, the search terms are once again getting interesting, so I’ve decided to revive the MSTS. Rejoice, citizens! This week’s take is a bit on the concise side, but bear with me as I get back into the groove with this thing.
got fucked by essay
Yeah, those essays can be players, can’t they? They open with a slick paragraph, and then win you over with logic and wit…and before you know it, you’re on your back at 2am in the morning, covered in print-outs of A Modest Proposal and The Essence of Humanism, face buried in the pages of a P.J. O’Rourke book. We’ve all been there, I think.
can you use any usb cable for alphasmart
Yes, any plain old standard A/B USB cable will work.
netbook versus alphasmart ad middle schoolers
One can be used for Facebook and porn and growing pot in FarmVille to sell in MafiaWars, the other one is good for nothing but writing. I’ll let you do the math there, Superintendent.
outragious comments by nancy grace
That could be either a better name for that twunt’s show, or a new perfume. “Outrageous Comments, by Nancy Grace. Ah, that scent of torches and hot blood. Smells like…mob justice.” Or, for European flair, they can call it Pitchforque.
haggis girl porn
Congratulations–you win this week’s prize for Most Disturbing Fetish. And I’m from Germany, where we know disturbing fetishes.
2011 wrangler million dollar tour
Sadly, that one didn’t come to pass in 2011, mainly because of a lack of a million bucks. But tell you what–pass the hat around and send me a million dollars, and I’ll do a 2012 Wrangler Million Dollar Tour. It will involve a rented luxury bus, and scheduled stops at liquor stores in every one of the lower 48 states.
desk full of drinks
The answer is “What will you find in the hotel rooms at every genre writers’ convention or workshop?”
I’m guessing that’s the new Porsche model that comes from the factory with mediocre Italian take-out food in the glove box.
lever rifle and revolver combo
I like the idea. You can have both in the same caliber and feed them from the same ammo box. Plus, lever guns and revolvers are cool. In fact, they should just issue lever-action Winchesters and Ruger Vaqueros to every member of the armed forces, along with white Stetsons and spurs for their boots.
standing desks for sale
It’s really hard to find a reasonably priced one. They have the GeekDesk, which is electrically adjustable, but that one is $800 or more. I got my two standing desks from the fly-blown carcass of Borders when they closed shop. There are desks called “shipping desks” that are used in freight and shipping centers for paperwork, and those are all standing height (and more affordable than the GeekDesk.) In a pinch, you can always do what I did at first and put a $25 WalMart coffee table onto a regular desk.
That’s the take for this week. Now it’s up to you, Internets, to refill the search term repository with weird queries like “what is the purpose of raccoons” or “how i mine for viagra fuk gril”. Get to it!